His Personal Assistant

Chapter 31

BPOV.

When I was 12 years old, and I had a crush on Joshua Stevens.

He was two years older then me, had the cutest smile in the entire world, and was one of the most popular guys in school.

I'd talk about him non-stop with Alice and Rose, passing notes about how I was certain he had casually waved at me during assembly, and eating our way through a pint

of cookies 'n' cream ice-cream when I found out he had actually been waving at that cow Sally Mitchells.

Then, when I was 13, and I developed a great pair of boobs, a miracle happened – Joshua Stevens got his best friend Paul Jackson to pass a note to Alice in English, so she

could give it to Rosalie in History, so Rose could give it to me in Biology. The note was asking whether I wanted to go to his brother's party with him (tick yes or no). Of course, I

was ecstatic and ticked "yes" without a second thought, even though his brother was a senior and had a reputation for throwing wild parties.

It was only once I had passed my "yes (tick), love Bella xo" through the proper channels (via Rose, Alice and Paul) that I remembered my mom had a gallery opening that night.

One of her paintings had gone up and she had been insanely proud. But I was 13 years old and my crush had asked me out so, needless to say, I went to the party with Josh,

telling mom that Alice was sick and needed me to sleepover.

Once the police had broken up the party and I came home stumbling drunk, it was blaringly obvious that I had been lying. I didn't even need the Catholic level of guilt trip that I

was given afterwards. I had already been conflicted the entire night, knowing how disappointed my parents would be in me.

Now, with this yearlong trip glaring me in the face, I was feeling the same level of guilt, of confusion.

On one hand, if it had been five months ago, I would have jumped on this opportunity, knowing that things like this so rarely come by in life. Hell, it was a miracle I got the deal

based on the drunken video application Jacob and I had made. I also had my parents, my friends, and my professors at school, all of whom were expecting me to do well for

myself, to take this scholarship and get ahead. They would all be so disappointed in me if I were to turn it down.

On the other hand, there was a twisting, painful feeling in my stomach every time I even considered not seeing Edward. Sure, he could makes trips to see me, but they would

be few and far between; if he were able to at all. Edward was running a successful, huge company, for goodness sakes. It was a miracle he was able to devote so much time to

me as it was. Even then, a selfish part of me wanted to demand he come with me; I knew there was a London branch of Cullen Industries. But he was going to be the Co-Chief

Executive Officer with his brothers; there was no feasible way he could leave the flagship of CIC for any extended period of time.

The point was – Edward was grounded in New York, and London was a long way away. The idea of not seeing him for 24 hours make me sick to my toes, the idea of 365 days

was almost unthinkable.

It was Josh Stevens all over again. Except with Josh's party it was easily to identify which decision was the right one and which was wrong. This situation was worse because