Behind the Mask of Alexandria Drear

The wrong words (Chapter 30)

   A week had passed, Alexandria had mentality healed little by little each passing day. Most days were good, but as usual there would be days were it seemed there was no progress what so ever. On days like that, everyone had to be very careful on their choice or words, any little thing could set her off.

   Yet today was one of those many good days that she'd been having, being so close to how she use to be. The purple haired witch had even started to hum to herself recently, something so small and normal to others, was something that gave her peace as of lately. It has always been the little things that could make or break any moment, she did hope that it would change  the more time that passed.

  The small family sat down for lunch, with Helena and Lilith back home, the manor didn't have a kind of empty feeling. Maybe that was just Alexandria missing her daughter, who had been gone for a few weeks. She had been traveling with Oz and his band once again.

  Alexandria sat between her mother and daughter, while her father, Rocco and Lilith sat on the other side of the large table. It was a quiet meal for a while, but eventually the family stuck up a conversation. The Duchess stayed quiet, she'd rather listen than talk while she was eating. It was still a factor from her time with Nicholas, but it was something she was fine with.

  Salem looked at his daughter after taking a sip of his wine. "I have been meaning to ask you, how many children would you have had by now? Not counting Helena."

  With that question, the room fell silent once more. All eyes on the former Duke, Alexandria's own widened at the random question, clearly the only one understanding the underlining of his question. She had no idea where this came from, or better yet why he was asking after all this time. Everyone else was a mix of surprise or confusion.

"... What are you talking about papa?" The witch asked hoping he'd drop it, Rocco's eyes narrowing at the other warlock.

  "You know what I'm asking, how many would you have had." Salem asked once again, Corvina only raising an eyebrow.

Alexandria felt the guilt she had buried so long ago, coming back almost double of what it use to be. She looked away, holding her hands in fists on her lap, making sure no one could see. "... Four..." She answered just above a whisper.

  Hearing that answer Helena felt her heart ache, coming to understand what this was about. Just when she believed her mother couldn't suffer anymore, the past somehow showed it's ugly head once again. ".. Mama." She you get woman muttered.

Lilith frowned and set her glass down on the table with a bit of force. "Why would you ask such a thing? A tragic subject isn't something you bring up at a meal with everyone in the room. That's her deal not yours, dad or not."

  Salem ignored the witch. "Helena was your first?" Alexandria nodded her head. "Was there two?" Again another shake or her head. "... Three?" She took a second but shook her head.

"... No.. There would have.. Been.. Four..." She answered holding her fists tighter, her shoulders starting to shake as she sniffed.

"Why was she the only one to make it to this world? Why it let the others?" By this point, the room had build up with mixed emotion; anger, sadness, shock and guilt.

"... I do not know.. Perhaps.. Something told me.. She needed to be here... I just.. I did not... I.. I did not what to have.. Any child of his.. Yet... Helena.. Is the child I needed.. I.. Excuse me.." She stood up quickly and left the room before anyone could say anything else. Tears were already running down her cheeks, making her way upstairs to her room. The only place she could even begin to grieve for her lost children once more.