Help me - ayato x suicidal reader

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VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED:
THERE IS GONNA BE LOTS OF DETAILS
LOTS OF SUICIDE REFERENCES
LOTS OF BLOOD
ANGST IN GENERAL
IF NOT WANTED GO TO OTHER CHAPTER
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Ayato and y/n have been friends for ages. He knew everything....well thought he did. He didn't know about your mental state. Of course he WAS focusing on other things.

Y/N POV:
I grabbed a blade and tears fell. I pressed it against my skin and pulled the blade down tearing it .

I'm weak

I watched the blood drip immensely and I cried softly

I don't wanna live

Everything I had gone. Friends. Family.I was alone without ayato. It always hurts when you're then only one there.
Words you say might be the last thing

I cried and i dropped the blade. I look at the deep slits and smiled weakly tears falling and hitting my black hoodie. I wipe my eyes getting a little blood on my cheek.

"If you're reading this its too late" i wrote on a paper I put it on the counter in the bathroom . I stood up and walked to my closet and waited for death to hurt me.

(time skip cause im crying)
Y/n pov
I woke up on a white bed  ans noticed stitches on my arms.
"Wh-..." i looked up and saw touka and kaneki....and ayato. I started to tear up and look down in shame.

"Suicide?.....y-y/n...suicide attempt?!" ayato yelled in my face. I noticed touka was crying and kaneki keeping his stale face. Ayato started to tear up and yelled
"Why?! Did you want me to cry? Did you want to see me CRUMBLE?!" tears fell and he hugged me tight and i weakly wrapped my arms around his neck . Touka look back at me and looked at kaneki who was on the verge of tears.

Ayato pov:

"I...-" i looked at her. Empty..thats what i saw in her eyes...pure emptiness. She wasnt the same human i fell for, years ago...her smile is gone and her eyes..her beautiful e/c are now empty holes. I look down and sniffled thinking. God i cant show weakness. My beautiful y/n. I looked at her and did something i would never do. I leaned in and kissed her then walked away furious and teary eyes.
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."Im sorry"




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