truth be told i was only hurting myself with the harshness i had been giving ethan lately. sure we had a family, mouths to feed, money to balance, schedules to work around. but every night i slept on that couch, it killed me a little inside. all the times i had fought with him, i felt i was pushing him away.
sure he was stubborn, he'd always been stubborn. i tried being nice, but it only went so far. i thought maybe if I was hard on him, he'd understand.
in reality i was only being hard on myself.
"ethan pull over."
"what?" he questioned.
"pull over babe." my voice was low.
ethan pulled off at the next available stop, shutting off the car.
"what's up babe?" he asked turning his body to face me.
"i love you." i breathed out, my lungs growing heavy.
"i love you too makena." he smiled running the backs of his fingers down my cheek.
"where's this coming from?" his thumb smoothing over my bottom lip.
"i've been so hard on you e...i thought that maybe if you put on my mom pants you'd finally realize that shit had gotten real. that things had changed and we needed to grow up a little, take more responsibility."
his face dropped as he took in my words. i took his hand in mine.
"but, honey, listen the only person i was being hard on was myself. everytime i act tough i feel i push you away. ethan i don't wanna push you away, i don't wanna lose you."
"you're never going to lose me kena, you've had my heart since day one. now i don't mean to change the subject or anything but, aren't you going to be late for work?" he checked his phone for the time.
"i'll call in sick." i stated.
"what?"
"you heard me. how get in the back seat." his eyes widened, as if questioning my command.
i widened mine in return.
ethan climbed into the backseat, and i was hot on his trail. as soon as he sat against the leather seat i parked myself in his lap, grabbing his face in my hands i smashed my lips against his. he grip tightened on my waist in reply. i removed my hands only to position his lower, i felt a smile against my mouth as i did.
"put the seats down." i commanded, my breathing becoming hard.
ethan all too quickly reached for every lever he could, sending us flying backwards.
i remained on top of him, kissing every inch of his tan delicious skin. his grip was so tight on me, his breathing even heavier. sliding my hands under his shirt, i removed it in one swift motion, throwing it against the back window.
i looked down at him, his face glowing with a smile that reached ear to ear. i smiled in return, making my way down his body. the further i went the more he replied, whimpers and moans leaving his lips, his hand traveling through my hair before he grabbed a fistful.
"kena...baby...are you sure?" i put my finger to his raw plump lips.
"i'm just as sure as i was the day i said 'i do'."
ethan suddenly threw me onto my back, his hands traveling my upper body, ripping off my shirt.
"you never pushed me away," he stated with every slow kiss.
"you only made me insanely horny." his eyes met mine as he pulled at the waistband of my shorts with his teeth.
now i grabbed a fistful of his hair as he made he way even further down my body. positioning himself against me, he forcefully undid his pants, panting with anticipation. i ran my hands up his arms, kissing his bare chest, letting my tongue travel over his right nipple piercing.
shoving off his pants into the front seat he moved me further back, sliding off my shorts as he did. he lowered himself, kissing just above my abdomen, taking the waistband of my panties in his teeth. ever so slowly he slid them over my thighs, and down my legs, leaving me exposed in front of him.
it was at times like this i felt most vulnerable. i loved giving him control, complete and utter control.
sliding my fingers into his waistband i pulled him against me, sliding off his boxers once he was pressed against me. as he was kissing my neck, he suddenly pulled away, his breathing hard.
"what about a condom?" he asked, his face covered with uncertainty.
"no condom." i answered, gently cradling his face.
"kena...are you sure? what if-"
"what if nothing. if anything happens, it happens. just shut up and fuck me already." i smiled up at him, and bit my lip, blissfully unaware and carefree of the world outside the suv doors.
