Lost Mendes || Camila/You

XXI

"Y/n your off beat again. You need to know this before jingle ball starts off." I sighed and leaned my forehead on the microphone. My manager has been on my ass for the last two hours, and I'm really starting to get annoyed.

"Look Marciano maybe if you stop being in my ass every five minutes I'll get it right." I groaned as I looked back at him. "I'm sorry okay I just can't focus." I saw him give me a small smiled and walked closer to where I was.

"I've heard whispers here and there, and I think I can guess who you're thinking about."

"Maybe you know, I honestly can't get her out of my head. She's all I'm thinking about." I sighed and sat down on the stage. "Then pour it on the music, Shawn told me you were working on a new song. How about you sing that to me and sing like she was right in front of you." I nodded my head and stood back up. I grabbed my guitar and plugged it in to the speaker, and slowly began to strum.

Every word I thought of her, and how much she claimed she loved me. Then when I'm at my worst she leaves me, but I understand why it was all too much for her. I would know how to cope with it myself.

I've been able to start over, I have a job I love. Fans that love my music and me. I have a beautiful girlfriend who cares about me, but yet I feel empty.

"That was beautiful. That song should be your new single I'm not even lying." I heard my manager say, I smiled lightly and nodded my head.
The last thing I wanted to think about was what music I was putting out, but I understand we don't always get what we want, and I know that from experience.

"H-have you just lost connection with someone and maybe lost all feelings? But you know that if you saw them you'll never be the same anymore?" I asked him as I jumped off the stage and landed swiftly on my feet.

"I have actually I-I lost my wife to someone. She cheated on me and I still loved her with all my heart, but I left her. I changed my number I lost all contact with her and moved away, but just one day we ended up bumping into each other. I knew in that moment that I didn't need her. For you it might be different you might see Camila and want to get her back but she might see you and will only see you as a friend."

Friend that word is the death of me, and thinking of Camila when I have. Lauren is wrong, but what I had with Camila doesn't go away the next day.

Just going out with two people my whole life you might think i don't know shit, but honestly I've learned a lot. They both make me feel different things. Camila was passionate and caring I always felt butterflies in my stomach, but with Lauren she's sassy and sexy and most of the time I just want to take her right then and there.

"Maybe... maybe, but I won't know until I find out."
-
"Two more days! Two more days until jingle ball!" I heard Lauren yell from the top of her lungs around the stage. I was watching Fifth Harmonys rehearsal and I couldn't stop laughing. They're all so sweet and I can't honestly not stay with them they're just too much fun not to be around.

"Y/n I swear if you don't get your girl I'm going to leave." I heard Dinah say into the microphone. Honestly she's become one of my great friends she's also the only one that knows I went out with Camila.

"Lauren can you please pay attention I don't want Dinah to leave me alone with all of you." I shouted from my seat. I could see Lauren roll her eyes and Dinah just laughing.

"Ouch Mendes I thought you actually cared about us." I heard Normani say  not short after. "Oh don't worry I think you already have enough loving from Khalid." I yelled, I know they're just be friends but I still get the feeling they could go somewhere.

"Y/n! We do not speak of him in that way!" Normani warned me from the edge of the stage.

"Hey be careful we don't want another slip up!" I joked and made my way towards Lauren. "Hey Im going to go to my dressing room real quick." I said holding on to her waist loosely.