Artificial

Reluctance

Ex-Hunter Katya

I sprint toward the entrance to the dropship depot, the IAF soldiers following as close as they can. A guard turns around and raises his rifle, but the female infiltrator appears from thin air behind him. She effortlessly breaks his neck with one hand, then seizes his rifle and guns down the other guard with the other.
Damn, she's good.
She then ejects the magazine and breaks it over her knee, rendering the rifle useless, and we run to the dropship. We all pile in together, and I end up next to Riot, the big one with the deep voice.
"Where's Evo And Vel?" he asks after counting heads.
"Vel fell out of the vent," Wraith reports. "I don't know where they went."
"We don't have time," the pilot concludes. "We have to leave them."
"No, we can't!" Riot contests. "They're probably on their way, just give them a few—"
"No! I'm getting us out of here! This is a goddamn hornet's nest!"
The dropship pulls away and banks into a sharp turn, the doors closing just as a rocket flies a few feet over us.
"Fuck, that was close," the pilot comments, letting out a deep breath as we hurtle away from the base.
"Too close," I respond under my breath. "We lost two."
Riot throws an arm across my shoulders, and I sink into his chest.
This was my fault.

The dropship lands, and the female AI soldier greets us. I watch her heart drop as she realizes two of them are missing. She drops down to a knee, and the IAF soldiers surround her.
My fault.
I turn to walk away and bump face-first into Riot's chest.
"Oh, sorry," I mumble out, trying my hardest not to sound like I'm on the verge of tears.
"This isn't your fault, you know."
Damn it.
"Am I that easy to read?"
"I'm good at reading people. Also, yes. Walk with me."
"Why?"
"You were walking away anyway, and I don't want to keep you."
"That's right, I was walking. By myself."
"Well, I'll keep you company."
"Damn it, leave me alone."
"Why?"
"Because I'm not one of you! I don't belong here! Why are you being so nice to me?"
"Because you do belong here! You're a soldier, just like us!"
"No, I'm not 'just like you'! I'm not—"
"What, augmented?"
"Yes!" I blurt out, then hang my head. "I'm weak. Slow. Useless."
"Listen, Katya, I don't know what things were like back home for you, but the IAF doesn't work that way. We're not elitist. We're about freedom of choice. You're not useless if you're baseline, you're just a little more humble. Baselines are considered just as special as augments. Some guys even prefer to date them."
"I see," I reply, wiping tears from my eyes. "Would you, by any chance, be 'some guy'?"
This is stupid. I'm stupid. First I'm shooing away a guy who just wants to keep my sorry ass company, then I'm bawling my eyes out to him, and now I'm hitting on him. What is wrong with me?
"No," he replies, effortlessly destroying me with one word.
"Oh," is all I can say, as tears well up in my eyes and my cheeks start to turn red.
God, I'm an idiot. Why would he want me? I'm so plain compared to everybody else here, how could he ever be interested in—
He places a finger on my chin and ever so lightly raises my gaze to look at him, smiling.
"I never said I wouldn't date a baseline. I just said I didn't go looking for them."
"Oh, I must look like an idiot."
"Maybe a little foolish," he delicately replies with genuine care. "But that's why I didn't want you to get your hopes up. Clearly your emotions are in a frenzy right now, and I don't want you to make any bad decisions. You hardly know me."
"I know enough. If anything, the fact that you're talking to me like this tells me you're a great decision."
"Well I appreciate the sentiment, but I still think we should take it slow."
"I think you're worth taking it slow for."
"Good," he replies, looking satisfied. "I have a nagging suspicion you are, too."
I look past him to see we've walked to a sort of quaint little bungalow, away from the rest of the camp.
"This is my living quarters," Riot announces. "You seemed stressed and tired, so I figured you could sleep here."
"Thank you. I am pretty exhausted."
"Well, there is one issue."
"What's that?"
"I'm tired, too, and there's only one bed."
"Riot, that's the opposite of a problem."
He smiles.
"That better be a joke. I said take it slow, and I meant it."
I groan, and give him my most angsty "Fine," a smile spreading across my face immediately after.
He shakes his head and chuckles.
"Lets head on inside."
After entering, he immediately walks over to his wardrobe, and changes into a gray IAF tank top and basketball shorts. I know I shouldn't, but I sneak a peek of him shirtless anyway. He's got a very heavily muscled build, and his swarthy skin looks smooth as silk. His jawline is square, rugged, and covered in light stubble, and his hair is kept in thick dreadlocks that he has tied up into a bun. He has a tattoo on the left side of his chest that reads "Riot", and one on his right upper arm that reads "2-2". He slides into bed as I stand at the side of it, nervously staring at him. He turns to look at me.
"What's wrong?"
"Well, I can only sleep in my underwear."
"I promise I'll keep to myself. You can trust me."
"I know, and I do. It's myself I don't trust."
He laughs. "Don't try anything, I'll start screaming."
I laugh too, but stay frozen in place.
"In all seriousness, I'm still feeling kind of inadequate."
The smile falls from his face. He slides toward the center of the bed and says. "Oh, girl, come here."
I stay frozen, and turn even redder.
"You can leave your clothes on. I just want to talk, I promise."
"Oh." I go to take off my boots, only to be so petrified by the thought of how ugly my feet are compared to everyone else's that I instead choose to sit at the edge of the bed.
"Honey, you have to stop comparing yourself to the other girls. They're on your team. They'll come to support you if you stay around. They're not your competition, and they're certainly not here to make you feel inferior. Well, Vel might be, but even she will come around eventually. Here in the IAF, we believe everyone has a place. No one is useless. You'll find your place here, and maybe even find someone to love."
I turn and look at him, and he raises and eyebrow, as if to say, "Yeah, I know you haven't given up on that."
"But before you can love someone else, you gotta learn to love yourself. Only then can you have a happy, healthy relationship."
"Thanks, Riot."
"No problem."
An earpiece on his nightstand buzzes, and he unfolds a visor and slips it on.
"Seems I'm needed elsewhere," he explains as he rises from the bed. "Make sure to get some rest, and lock up when you leave."
He tosses me an extra pair of keys.
"Good night, Katya."
"Good night, Riot, and thanks for everything."
The door closes, and I finally disrobe, lie down, and fall asleep.