Christian's Yearning

CH03 ~ Broken ~

~ Broken ~

Once in the SUV, Christian grabs his phone.

“Mr. Grey?” Welch’s disembodied voice answers

“I need you to find out Ana’s schedule for the next two weeks”

“Yes, Sir. Anything else?”

“There was a press release with Ana next to a male model; find out who that guy is”

“Right on it, Sir.”

After the call, Christian turns to his bodyguard. “Taylor, have that door fixed.”

“Yes Sir.”

“Also, we are going to New York; make the proper arrangements.”

 “Yes, Sir. When do you need the plane by?”

“I want to be airborne within the next four hours.”

“Right away, Sir”

Christian walks into his study and turns his back to the world; his inner dialog kicking in.

New York?

Yes, I am going to get what is mine.

She was never yours, Grey. She never signed the contract!

He closes his eyes. She is what I want. I always get what I want.

You always buy what you want. Ana is not for sale, buddy. If you haven’t noticed, you cannot buy yourself into this one.

No, I can’t. He nods and swirls his tongue around his mouth.

Grey, what kind of a Dom are you?

She is not my sub, so I am not her Dom… He rubs his injured hands on his pant legs. We need to redefine the terms of the relationship that’s all… he picks an invisible piece of lent off his knee.

To be what exactly?

… the one thing I never considered before… and he answers out loud: more.

Christian pours his first drink of the day, Scotch, and walks around his office still holding the almost empty bottle. He leans against the large window overlooking the Seattle sky line. The city lights twinkling in the dark.

Why more? It would be easier to get a sub, for a month or two or three, with clear expectations and rules.

He pours the last drink into the now empty glass and throws the bottle against the wall. His left hand forms a fist inside his pants pocket.

Since when do you want more, Grey?

We are broken without her.

News flash buddy, we have been broken and a fuckup long before we knew Anastasia was alive.

Christian walks to the couch, lies down, closes his eyes, and runs his hands through his hair.

Yes, but never as bad as we are without her.

… two months earlier June 14th Seattle, W.A. …

Four days after Ana walked away, in the afternoon of June eighth, Christian left Seattle. He wanted to escape, to try and forget, and to get away from the misery that was his life without Ana.

June fourteenth, Christian returned feeling only partially successful in achieving his goal. He landed Charlie Tango with ease; earlier, he gave marching orders for it to be taken back to Sea-Tac. As he walked to the awaiting SUV and his ever trusted security detail, Taylor, Christian wondered if Ana would agree to talk to him. Maybe she will see him and perhaps start a friendship.