3 am Thoughts

Ben

I realized that I'll name titles with people's names and it kinda reminds me of a "13 Reasons Why" thing... oh well!

So, Ben and I are roommates that live with 4 other people. It's a split house with 3 boys and 3 girls... it's a lot of fun and less drama. Well, maybe... that's up for debate.

Ben and I have become friends over the past few months, which I'm grateful for. Neither of us particularly love our one housemate, Kristina. She's nice and all but something just doesn't click, ya know?!

Anyways, Ben is on the swim team along with my other housemates so Kristina and I drove up and supported our friends. It was a blast and we were all having a great time. On the last day, Ben competed in finals and achieved 2nd overall in one of his events. I was so happy for him that as soon as he walked out of the locker room, I gave him a hug and told him congratulations. He laughed and hugged back.. no big deal, right?!

Kristina then proceeds to come up to me after Ben walks away and says, "wow, you're such a flirt"! I've been called a flirt before, several times, but I'm only slightly attracted to Ben physically. It's a mess in my head but nothing would ever come from the physical attraction.

Flash forward to a week ago... I asked Ben to help me in the lab with my extra credit project and he said yes! I had invited two of his friends to come so they would all be there to conduct the experiment that I was going to teach them. After they finished, Ben and his friend Cary stayed after to help me clean up (thank the lord). Once Ben was done what he could help with, he turned to me and said that he had to tell me something. I can't even begin to describe how rapidly my heart started to beat, it was deafening. I told him the cliche "you can tell me anything" and what he told me left me confused and livid.

Kristina apparently told Ben that she thinks that the two of us have been having sex for a while and that she disapproves.

I was heartbroken that she thought that I was cheating and livid that she didn't talk to me about it.

Now it's a joke between Ben and I but it's hella confusing. Like I sleep in my bed every night and he's Skyping all of these random girls. We're not compatible and it sucks that I'm penalized because I think he has nice abs.

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I think that's all for this update, for now! Have a great day y'all and remember that you're worth it❤️