Love letters to my non-existent boyfriend

#6

You called me your girl just a few minutes ago. You have no idea how much that made me smile. You make us seem like a lot and nothing at all at the exact same time. I love the thought of being your girl and you being mine. It was the cutest thing you've done yet though, I loved it, like I love everything you do.

You seem to be perfect and I know that I've said it before but you really are, especially to me. You also called me pretty, which is uncommon for me to get called, so it meant a lot to me.

I don't understand how I'm supposed to feel or how I'm supposed to control these feelings but you seem to do a lot better than I am. You are good at hiding things though, you have hidden your feeling for many years before I met you and I guess it's a habit for you huh. I want to capture how you make me feel and be able to open it on bad days, when I need you most.

You have been there for me as much as you could've been but I'm unpredictable and you never know my next move, but that's how I like it.

I like to keep people guessing. It makes things interesting and you want to stay so you can find out a pattern.

It's a mind trick I guess, but you should know a lot about that now shouldn't you, with all of the games that you play. I wanted to avoid you in the beginning, but you wouldn't let that happen. You kept talking to me even though I didn't talk back, you kept asking questions and stating little comments that made me laugh a little but it made my day a little more tolerable. I needed that little laugh some days, other days I wanted to be mad at the world but I couldn't do that if I were laughing so it annoyed me that making me smile came so easily to you.

You are really good at making people smile though, you make your entire lunch table smile almost everyday just by being your stupid self. But this stupid little girl fell in love with your stupid self, which makes us both stupid.

I don't like looking stupid though and my friends didn't like you until they saw how happy you made me, then you became popular to doing what no other could do, you made the smartest girl in school like someone who wasn't so smart. You did silly things and I liked that you put forth so much effort into your one sided conversations with me. Effort is pretty damn cute to many people.

Especially the smartest girl in school. I made myself look stupid by hanging out with you, and when I started talking to you, I found my escape. I like my own little escape from the world. I really don't like the world because it is so cruel and it makes some really bad people.

But I liked my escape from it. I liked that it created you and made you run into me, literally. That's how we met, don't you remember?

It was passing period between 6th and 7th hour and we were both going to lunch. You were walking a little too fast and I wasn't really paying attention. I stepped out and got trampled by a boy who made my heart fall to my feet.

I'll finish the story tomorrow but I have to go tonight. I love you. Bye.