super frictonal {diza}

chapter: 4

ad·mon·ish

/ədˈmäniSH/
verb
warn (someone) of something to be avoided

after the party ends, i somehow found myself in a car with someone i was hardly friends with. but i shall say right now before i forget, i want to get to know him better. but i'm surely not going to admit it. but there was that small part of me that was curious, and it felt amazing. oh how badly it sparks a little fire in me, and i try my hardest to contain myself and not smile wider than he had smiled previously as we danced. he looks over at me and the look of confusion spreads across his face.

    "why are you so happy?" he asks and i shrug.

    "i don't know. i'm just happy, mainly because you make me happy." i say and as he focuses on the road with the steering wheel in his masculine hands, he smiles. not as wide as my smile, however. but pretty close.

    "wow," he says. "we haven't even become best friends yet and i already make you smile." i nod and blush.

    "yeah, it's crazy isn't it?" i declare and he nods, his smile only growing wider.

    "definitely." i look at him one last time before i stare out at the window, watching the city light glare off my face, making me forget about each and everything in my life. quickly i roll down the window and i take a deep breath, smelling the refreshing night air. i intake the air into my nostrils and almost immediately, my eyes roll to the back of my head as i sink into my seat with pure lust. and for some odd reason, i feel josh's eyes on me. however, i silence my thoughts and stay quiet, enjoying this moment.

    "why do i feel like you've written a whole book about your life, and slowly showcased each and every page to me for only i to read?" he whispers as he parks in front of my apartment complex. i open my eyes and look at him.

    "i don't know. perhaps you've fallen under a spell of curiosity. and perhaps you're obsessed with the amount of sensitivity my being releases." for some odd reason, he's being sincere, and i try to contain myself from laughing at how serious he's being.

    "correct," he agrees and i roll my eyes.

    "i was being sarcastic , silly." i lightly push his shoulder and now it's his turn to roll his eyes.

    "i wasn't." and now it's my turn to showcase my seriousness. i scoff and look at him in pure disbelief.

    "no," i disagree. "why would you want to get to know me?" i purely ask him, sincerely curious.

    "why would i not?" i laugh, leaning my head back as i slap my knee.

    "you're one hilarious guy, josh." i might be crazy, but i swear i can feel his eyes burn into me with a sharp glare.

    "liza, i'm being dead serious. why aren't you believing me?" i roll my eyes and scoff.

    "how can i believe you?" he looks at me confused. "i'm not one to be curious about. i'm an ocean of pure and utter chaos. i'm like a strike of lighting. i'll hit you so unexpectedly, and then i'll slowly form my grey clouds around me as the rain drips. and then i'll form a full on storm, rain just pouring out from the sky. and then you'll ask why, 'why are you crying?' and then i'll whisper 'i don't know' and then you'll try to comfort me and i'll enjoy your embrace for a split second but then the next second i'll push you away. and slowly but surely, you'll find your way back and i'll find myself in the same exact spot. pushing you away as you release your caring and sensitive side towards me." he scoffs.

    "why would i care?" he says with pure concern.

    "that's the thing, you won't." i think for a second and i know i'm being ridiculously stupid for thinking that everyone is this way. because i know deep down somewhere in my cold and hardened heart that someone cares. i'm not dumb. but i'm also not one to be near. it's almost like i'm saying, 'yes, hello my name is liza and i am very much radioactive, so please watch the premises and stay far away, as i'll most likely explode of chemicals. be ware.' and that's truly what it's like for me.

    josh looks at me and i look at him. i sigh, feeling bad for how ludicrous i sound. but i know he's not taking no for an answer. and i slowly feel myself give in. i mean, c'mon. how can i? his dimples are too deep to crawl out of.

    "can i at least get to know you before i judge?" i roll my eyes and sigh, thinking for a moment.

    "what would you say if i said yes?" i ask and he smiles.

    "what would you say if i asked for your number so we can get to know each other better?" i shrug.

    "what if i gave you my number?"

    "what if i gave you mine?"