klangst one shots

Dear you (klansgt)

A/N: trigger warning: talk of suicide.

Dear Lance,

I hope you don't mind me writing, because it's been a while since we last spoke. I thought that it would be great to catch up. I mean all that time, I don't know where it went. It seems like just yesterday we were in school, having lunch with Pidge and Hunk, hanging out in general. It was fun wasn't it. In my mind your already doing so well. You were always one to go far. I know this is unimportant, I know I hadn't called, but tell me all there is to tell.

-Keith xxx

Dear Lance,

It seems like you must have moved house, the last address I got from you was time ago now. I bet your living in a nice house with your wife, or three, you were always such a player when we were sixteen. Flirting with everyone, boys, girls, you even hit on our English teacher once!  Your probably living in Spain or somewhere awesome. It would be great if we could meet up again! I hope your doing great.

Keith xxx

Dear Lance,

I'm not sure I'm even sending these letters to the right place. I just want to say, I always felt like I know you, I think of you when I get lonely. There isn't much I can do right now, but I'm reaching out to you now. Please reply.

Do remember when we went dancing long ago? We drank till we had to home, you flirted with the door man, that was the last dance we ever had together. It was great. I don't regret anything we did. How's your fancy house? Who is your lucky girl? Christine? Or did you dump her way back? Knowing you, you did.
It may be a bit of a shocker, but I'm not living in a nice house like you, more like one room, it's cold and damp, and not the best. How did you do it? Constantly smiling, knowing that you'd get there eventually. I always admired that about you.

-Keith.

Dear Lance,

It's me again, obviously it's a letter, it's funny because writing to you makes me feel better.

I really thought last night might have been it.
Like I just couldn't deal with anymore Shit. When did we get so old? When did we stop seeing each other? We're building careers, how on earth did we get here? Now we're grown up, and nothing matters anymore.

It got so dark and I just couldn't see me waking up the next morning. I wanted to disappear and I was scared that if I did, it would be at least five days before anyone noticed. I just don't know. Writing to you, it makes me feel like we are kids again, and everything seems fine. Please, I just want to see your handwriting again. So Lance, I know why you don't want to reply, I'm a nobody now, it would be best for you to let go of your past and continue with what ever family you have now, but please, for me. Write back.

- Keith.

Dear Lance,

I called your old landline number last night. I suppose I called because you haven't replied. I remembered those numbers since 2003. I managed to get through to you parents, they were so surprised!

They asked me if I still lived near Park drive, and how my brother was doing. I said everything was more than fine, and asked if I could speak to you. I knew something was wrong when I heard your dad cry and your mother take the phone outside.

She told me how hard you tried.
How it didn't work out with you kids and wife.
I swear, I nearly dropped the phone, I had tears in my eyes, when she told me you took your own life.
Lost your life.

It's so weird to think your gone. I was stupid to think I could have the past back. I never thought you would be lonely. I guess now your gone it doesn't matter anymore, and I can tell you this now, I love you Lance, and I'm so sorry I didn't write sooner.

I really do have no one now. I never got to see you grown up, but I bet you were more the man than I ever was. So I guess this is goodbye forever.

Lots of love

-Keith xxx