24 Weeks Of Knowing Him

1

Things are getting worse than ever. I lost my job, we are into dept, mom is over her mind and my little brother just worse our situation by putting mom in a mess.
I was trying to find a job but couldn't find one who suits me. I know I'm not in a position to decline offers but I can't picture myself working in a scholar bus, even my mom couldn't picture that.

"Honey it's a NO for you. I didn't work my butt out and pay your university to find you ending up working in a scholar bus" she said.

"Yeah, I'm sure I couldn't even do the job I'm so into office and stuff" I said agreeing with what she said.

Honestly talking the job isn't that hard. You just have to make sure that the kids are coming home safe and you get your paycheck every month, easy as saying go to hell to your school teacher after a surprise test, easy.

"You already leave your job application at where I told you to?" She asks.

"Yeah. I already tried every company that I could possibly work in and nothing" I said.

"We need to be patient"

"Things that I learned since 2014 but it's still a long way to walk on for me" I said loudly breathing out.

"Patience again"

"Maybe I need to move, go back to my roots. I don't know... to see if there's better things left for me somewhere else" I suggest.

"Look, I wouldn't be the one who'll be on your way if you wanna move but you need to really want it. You need to ask yourself if it's really what you want cuz you'll be alone out there, I wouldn't be around to make sure if you ate today or if you need some money. Sure things is I will call you, I will help if I can but there's no promises, you'll be on your own. There's family there but you know you can't count on them, they have their life and I don't want you to be someone's burden you're still under my responsibility.  I promised it to your father"

No no no no. No tears for today. Please mom.

"Mom, I just suggested it. It's not like I'll move tomorrow. It was just a thought according to the situation right now." I try to explain.

"Yes dear but I'm just still saying, one day or another I'll tell you that, if you decide to do it you know"

"Yeah I know mom."

That's the kind of conversation that you'll have with my mother if one day you'll meet her. She's tough, responsible, strict, sensitive,  funny and sometimes annoying in every possible way, but she's my mother and I love her even with her weaknesses and flaws.
She is the most strongest person that I've never met in my entire life and I'm amazed by her resistance in everything. She's murmuring every times, but what is Mrs. Clark without all that. Probably the most tiring and annoying person in the world that I will avoid being my mother. No just kidding.

"You gotta go out this evening?" She asks

"Uhm.. yeah I'm bored staying at home"

Yeah. It's boring to always being at home alone when the network is so slow, when you already read twice every book that you own at your house and when you start to know every words of every movie you have at home. So allow me to search for something new as I always said :  You stay at home, you see the kitchen. You go out, you'll find something new. Who knows I could make some friends too. No sorry the last one is my mom's sentence.

"Okay. I wouldn't be out before 5:30 p.m. Our boss is being strict after she saw one of my workmate out when she was supposed to be working" she said

"Ah." I said at her then turn to my brother "Mogly, you need to bring your keys cause I wouldn't be here when you'll come home"

"I always bring my keys" he said probably tired by me always teasing. him.

I promise you it's not his real name but after one of my crush who was always coming at home starts calling him like that because he always wear red underpants ( he was 5 years old so he don't care enough about covering his body ) when he comes visiting us, that I started calling him like that too.

I miss that dude. He must be at his home sitting in his sofa sipping soda when he watches TV right now. I wished something could change between us, not that I wanna be with him but I just want to talk to him. Being the best budd' we were before, I still don't understand why he's acting this way towards me. I didn't do anything wrong as far as I remember but him... it's like he woke up one day and boom I don't have no clue who's Kahleel I never talked to her nor be her best friend. But it's fine you know,  I'm used to it. People will say straight in the eyes that they will never leave you but end up doing it, now I don't take it as a big deal because it don't hurts me no more. I passed the age of crying every night wetting my pillow for things like that after replaying their actions in my mind.

After our lunch, they prepare their self to go back to school and work when I do the dishes.

"Sisi, you think it's better with the grey one or the black ?" My brother asks me.

"You gotta put sneakers or flip flop?" I ask back. He don't really care about wearing flip flop at school and that's the thing that I like with him. He don't need to be all swag and stuff, but there's time he can't be simple.

"Uhm flip flop it's way hot out there"

"Black top black flip flop and jeans" I said "

He leads to my wardrobe to take my hat but I stop him.

"No no no boy! Don't touch my stuff if I didn't give you permission to."

"Can I?" He questions with puppy eyes.

"NO" I said sharply "where is the one I gave you last month ?"

"I lost it at school" he said looking at his feet.

"See. That's why I don't give you another one"

"Okay. Next time then"

"Yeah... Wait, what ?" I said confused.

"Nothing" he laughs at me.

I lied down in my bed when they called me to close the gate from inside. I kiss them goodbyes then go back where I was earlier.
I couldn't even take a nap because it was too hot for that, our fan don't work after I smashed it accidentally with  Mr. Spalding ~my basketball ball~ clumsy as I am, plus I remember that I needed to prepare what I gotta do for the kids this Saturday. I'm a member of our neighborhood association to entertain the kids under 15 years old and every Saturday we need to search for something new to draw their attention on educational things not just video games and social media things.
Most of the time we do it at Luke's house but this week their family wasn't in town so I take the relay. I had the idea to create the association, he have the necessary to bring it to life. We started with 5 kids and now we have 27 on it and it's growing.

After scrolling on the internet for two hours straight I found what to do. I shut my laptop down and took shower then get out of the house.

Headphones on, I let my iPod be my Dj for today. I walk until I come at the final destination or not really.

 
The view is amazing. People are playing beach soccer, beach volley and some just sit. I took a deep breath of pure and fresh air fulling my lung then exhale slowly. I like this feeling.
Taking my tongs off I start walking the distance until I reach the seaside. Barefoot, the cold wave crushed on my feet leaving wet sands on it, I smile internally and thank God for his creations.
Before I decide to sit I give myself the pleasure to immortalize the perfect view at the moment the sun goes down, I can't count how many sunset pics I have in my phone right now. It could easily be my passion.