Across The Hall

I wasn't ready

Cameron laid next to me, silently peacefully. The words that just came out of his mouth. Must have been said because we just had sex. He was vulnerable. He was desperate.

I couldn't sleep, I couldn't if I tried. I didn't love him he didn't love me. What is love? Love is when you give someone permission to break your heart.

I put my underwear and my bra back on as quiet as I could and wrapped the hotel robe around my body and walked out of the hotel room to the lobby, I didn't know what to do. I mean I was pretty much naked.

"Hello?" She answered the phone.

"Lucci can you pick me up?" I caught my breath.

"Are you okay it's like 3 in the morning?"

"I'm at the Chicago hotel." I said instead of answering her question.

"Delilah!!" I heard from behind me.

"Umm I gotta go Lucci." I hung up the phone. I turned and I saw the perfect bodied boy.

"Where are you going."

"I shouldn't have done what we just did."

"Delilah it's fine." He cuddled me in his arms, but I pushed away.

"No Cameron. You don't know me."

"Delilah I don't have to know everything about you to know that I love you."

"Cameron yes you do, you don't know the first thing about love you don't know how scary it is in my mind."

"What are you so afraid of"

"You... Falling in love with you."

"Why would you be afraid of me.. wh.."

"I still like Taylor...!" I lied. A huge ass lie that came from no where.

"What I... " before he could finish the sentience Lucci pulled up to the front doors.

"I'm I'm so sorry." I said as we both saw the sadness in each others eyes. And the tear running down his cheek. Wow how bad I felt for his poor little heart.

"What the hell!" Lucci said as I shut the door behind me. Hard loud sad emotional sobs came once we drove away from where he couldn't see me anymore.

"I I I lied right to his face." I couldn't breathe.. The more I thought about it the more tears came.

"What dude talk to me." She looked over at me then back at the road.

"I told him I still like Taylor." The more I tried to talk the harder it was to breathe .

"It makes sense if you still do. I mean y'all just broke."

"No Lucci! I never ever liked Taylor. The second I kissed Cameron I knew I liked him!! I was hoping my feelings for Cameron would go away if I tried to like Taylor." I shouted. Lucci slammed on her brakes.

"I didn't know that. Why would you do that.?"

"Because I was... Umm scared of falling in love. And I don't know how to stop myself from not being afraid."

"You love Cameron?"

"No." I looked out the window at the dark sky.

"You need Cameron in your life" After those words the car ride was quiet. My house came into sight. How glad but how sad I was to be home.

The words I said 'I never ever liked Taylor.' Made me feel like such a whore.

"See ya tomorrow." Lucci opened the door for me. She was acting kinda mad at me. Something I didn't need right now, I was already a mess.

Cams P.O.V.

This is the first time I've ever loved only to have it shot down. I stood outside the hotel for how many minutes just staring at the empty space where the car was. I wasn't sure if I should have said something more... Or if I should call her. But she likes Taylor.. my name is Cameron.

I slowly started walking up the stairs to make it back up to the room. I don't even know how to feel anymore. Some part me tells me to run after her.. Another part tells me to stay and wait. But for what? Love? What if she never loves me.. What if the girl of my dreams is her and I just let her leave. And falls in love with someone who isn't me.

"Hey hun." My mom answered the phone.

"Delilah still likes Taylor." I felt like such a girl to call my mom when I'm sad but I couldn't stand it.

"But I took her to prom." I couldn't tell my mother that we just had sex.

"Okay?"

"I'm in love with her."

"Oh."

"What do I do?"

I talked on the phone with her for about 40 minutes. But really we just went in circlers. But she did say 'wait for her. Your career is just taking off, You have your whole life ahead of you. If she wants you she'll come to you'

'She's yours.' I texted Taylor.

'She hates me' He texted back.

'She told me she still likes you'

'Why would she say that, I kissed another girl..'

'Which was an ass hole move...'

I couldn't think straight.. I don't think I have been this hurt since my dad left our family. Delilah doesn't make any sense. She gets afraid of me and lies and says that she is into Taylor... But Taylor says she hates him.. I just couldn't wrap my head around it. She gave me goosebumps. A girl out of thousands that I could have I only want one. Delilah.. And it had to be the most selffish's and most outrageous girl there is. But my heart wants what it wants and it wants her..

But I'm giving up on her. Ripping my heart apart.