where you belong

Chapter 16

Getting out of the bed was the hardest thing in the Universe these days. He instinctively reached for his charging phone but his hand stopped midway because he knew too well there was no “good morning” message waiting for him. Not anymore. Shower. Fresh clothes. No food – his stomach couldn’t take anything beside orange juice lately, it was in knots all the time and he wasn’t even trying to make it better. He grabbed his backpack and headed towards the college, checking the date while in the bus; the number of the day told him 6 days have passed since he last saw Kookie. If his sleeping schedule was still messed up and he lost weight, he couldn’t cry anymore because sobs felt useless, they weren’t going to bring his boyfriend back. 

Class. Break. Class. Break. He couldn’t concentrate on the words of his teachers, he was barely getting his projects done, everyone was complaining and asking what happened to him but he couldn’t tell. Tae told him Kookie was right to be hurt, he would have reacted badly too if he was involved in the situation and Jimin was completely agreeing, he knew he was the one at fault. The conversation happened the next day after the decision was taken, when the blond couldn’t breathe anymore and had to text Tae to come over, unable to stop crying and pulling at the skin of his arms, marking it with his nails, considering he deserved all that pain. When his friend saw him he had no idea how to react so he enveloped him in a hug and held him like that for hours, until he could actually talk and tell him what happened. He slept at Taehyung’s place a few days but he knew it was not fair to mess his schedule so he decided he needed to handle this in his own flat.

How much was a break supposed to last? It’s been almost a week. Sometimes he wanted to just grab the phone and dial Jungkook’s number but that wouldn’t have been fair to anyone. The man always respected his limits so it was his turn to reciprocate even if that meant slowly dying. 

The days were passing slowly – after college and a bit of work he was usually having dinner with Thomas who never said a word about how little he ate. If his Daddy would have been there, he wouldn’t have heard the end of it until his plate was empty. 

“Mouse?” He snapped out of it and looked up, faking a smile. “Are you with me?” 

“Yes, yes, sorry.” The blond mumbled and let out a long sigh. 

“I was telling you about this party...” It was mostly Thomas talking when they met but the boy wasn’t bothered by that because he barely had anything to say. Tae told him he shouldn’t see him anymore but he couldn’t decline a man that hasn’t done anything to him, it was not Thomas’s fault for the bad turn in his relationship, it was his for being dishonest. “Would you like to come to my place?” They were friends and he’s never been there so he accepted out of curiosity and because he wanted to spend as little time as possible alone. 

He was expecting an expensive flat but instead of that he got a mansion, placed in a luxurious neighbourhood, that intimidated him so badly he didn’t want to get out of car. He knew the man couldn’t put up with his insecurities – Jungkookie would have waited even for an hour if that made him feel better, it happened before – so he forced himself to exit the vehicle and enter the enormous building that had a Victorian architecture and that was outstanding in between the traditional houses near it. A nice man took his coat and then a short woman appeared, asking if he’d like something to drink. He opened his mouth but the other was one step ahead. 

“Tea.” Jimin jumped startled when his hand was caught in a bigger one and he was lead upstairs. The hot tea was to be brought to what looked like a living room but it must have been as spacious as his and Yoongi’s bedrooms put together. “Take a seat.” Thomas lit a cigarette before sitting down himself and throwing an arm around the smaller shoulders beside him. He was acting differently but Jimin couldn’t voice his concern.