Childish

Chapter 10

I sit down sweating, I'm going to make a total fool out of myself!
People go on, and I patiently wait
Nervousness building up inside me
And then
"Now presenting joey Graceffa with dark enough"
I stand up and walk up to the stage and sit down on the piano seat
I look out at the audience and see everyone staring at me, I take a deep breath
For Meghan

*song at the top*

There is a girl
In the front of my class
Who I swear I've never seen
Do anything but laugh

She's tall and she's smart
Beautiful and strong
And when someone's down
She tries to fix what is wrong

How does someone so perfect,
Feel so insecure?
As to scar her skin with cuts and burns
And still want to hurt more...

How does someone so loving,
Learn to hate her own guts?
Drawing a picture on her arms with a blade
As if her mind isn't dark enough

There is a girl
In the front of my class
Who's eyes are glazed over
Like newly cut glass

The ghost of a smile
Hints at her face
And she laughs as they tell her
"Who's on First Base"

How does someone so perfect,
Feel so insecure?
As to scar her skin with cuts and burns
And still want to hurt more...

How does someone so loving,
Learn to hate her own guts?
Drawing a picture on her arms with a blade
As if her mind isn't dark enough

There is a girl
In the front of my class
Who's sad that you find it rare
To see her smile or laugh

Her friends tells her jokes
Like that one with the guy
But all she does is close her eyes
And enter her mind

How does someone so perfect,
Feel so insecure?
As to scar her skin with cuts and burns
And still want to hurt more...

How does someone so loving,
Learn to hate her own guts?
Drawing a picture on her arms with a blade
As if her mind isn't dark enough

For her imperfections...

There was a girl
In the front of my class
Who yesterday took
The breath that was her last...

She wrote a few notes:
"I'm sorry I didn't say,
But my mind was messed up,
You couldn't save me anyway...

And to the girl in the back of the class,
Who feels the way I did...

How does someone so perfect,
Feel so insecure?
As to scar her skin with cuts and burns
And still want to hurt more.

I take a deep breath in and look at everyone, they all start clapping and cheering and I feel this thing inside of me. It feels.. nice
I feel, happy?
This is what being happy feels like?
I fill my mouth curve up into a smile, I exhale and laugh
I sit up and walk back down to my seat and breath in, it's over.

...

I walk out of the hall and go to my locker to put my music sheets in there when, Daniel stops me.
"Was that song about Meghan?"
I turn around and look at him
"Why do you care?"
"Look joey I'm trying to be nice to you!"
The bell goes and everyone goes for lunch, except me and Daniel
"It's too late you've already ruined my life"
"That's why I'm trying to be nice, I don't want to make it worse!"
"What about your 'cool kid look' you can't ruin that can you" I say mocking him
"Joey I'm sorry!"
"Why are you trying to be nice, why aren't you bulling me about being gay?"
"Because, being gay is fine"
I look Daniel and he's looking away from my eyes
"Daniel.. are you gay?"
"What n-no Why wou-"
"Tell me the truth"
Me and Daniel make direct eye contact
Daniel nods, but his eyes start getting glossy
I know he's about to cry
So, I did what I did
I wrapped my arms around his and hugged him
Great thing is, he hugged me back..
"It's ok"
We pull away and look eachother in the eyes
"Thank you" he says wiping his tears before walking back to his locker
I finish putting my stuff in my locker and go sit down by myself.
I'm playing on my phone when someone sits next to me.
"Hi?"
"Hello, you don't mind if I sit here right?"
"No not at all"
"My names shane"
"Nice to meet you Shane, I'm joey"