Childish

Chapter 9

I put the pencil in the pencil tin and tuck my computer chair in, I pick up my phone and see 3 new messages from Daniel, I jump on my bed and read them

Hey, I'm sorry about filming you. And making fun of you
I still hate you just sorry about today
Bye

Wow makes me feel so much better knowing my love life hates me
Love life, fuck I gotta face it..... I like Daniel
I look at the comments and everyone in Daniels squad calling me a faker, saying
What friends?
Faker, I highly doubt your friend is dead!
He's gay, why would he have friends!
I turn off my phone and cry,
I feel like such a disappointment being gay
I feel like such a disappointment for letting Meghan do that to herself
I feel like such a disappointment to be alive
I roll off my bed and walk down to the kitchen. I take water out of the fridge and go back up stairs. I turn on my Tv and watch stranger things.
I just need time to relax..

...

It's the next morning and were performing our songs today, I'm literally going to die.
I'm going to be made fun of
I'm going to stuff up
I'm not going to have a good singing voice
This isn't ok
I take my music sheets and take my phone and head down stairs and grab my bag
"Bye"
I walk out the door and drive to the school.
I hop out and think, who am I going to hang out with?
I walk over to a bench and play on my phone, sooner or later the bell rings.

I get up grabbing my bag and head to English
I sit down throwing my bag on the ground and put my head in my arms
At this point, nothing really matters, nothing but one thing.. Meghan
"Mr Graceffa head up"
"Mr Graceffa!"
I keep my head down because I'm crying over Meghan, and I really don't want people to see me cry
"Joseph!"
Legit tears are streaming from my eyes.
The teacher walks over to me and pulls my hair to make me look up. I smack her hand away and see everyones starring and my miserable face. I grab my bag and bolt out the doors.

"Someone go after him!" I hear her voice in the distance.
I run out the front of the school and sit on one of the benches and cry.

"Why do I have to have the worse life?"
"Why does my best friend have to die?"
"Why does every one hate me?"
"Why does my mum not want me to be gay?"
"Why do I get bullied?"
"Why do I cut?"
"Why does my love life hate me?"

I sob
"Who's your love life?"
A voice behind me says
A voice that to familiar
Daniel Christopher Preda
My eyes widen I don't look at him
I can't let him know he's my love life
"Go away"
"Not until I get my answer"
Ha, he things I'm ganna tell him
"I'm never going to tell you"
"Well miss S wants you inside"
He says walking away
I don't follow, I just sit here and wait
The bell goes and now it's time for me to preform my song,
I get a text from my mum
Mum🙄: hey sweetie, moving the last bits of everything today
Wow, I forgot about moving. Even tho half the house is gone. I haven't even seen the house yet.
I get up and walk back inside the school, it's my time to preform.....