A Secret

The Feeling

I wake up to the song "Shake it Off" by Taylor Swift and I roll my eyes. Axel had set this song as my ringtone for me recently and would give me puppy-dog eyes if I tried to change it. He was good at that though, must've learned from his sister.

My head feels like someone had split it in half with an axe. Sounds like something "the axe" would do. I pick it up sighing, running my hand through my hair.

"Look, if you want money, I told you I don't have any to spare, go bother Michael," I say exasperated.

"I'm only slightly offended that that's all our relationship is based on. Anyways, later tonight  Mike is having a party and I was wondering if you'd come," Axel says.

"Did Mike not invite me? Because if so tell him I know what really happened that one time he a-" I started.

"No, no, no. I was just personally asking you because well...I know how your parents are and....this party is going to be huge, I know how your parents are more forgiving when they know I'm with you. So uhm yeah, you should come," he finished lamely.

Don't get me wrong socializing is great but, with people who you hardly know, who are more then likely to be an asshole? Yeah, this was a rich kid party. Well, Mike being the rich kid. All the others are just drawn to the money.

"...JT?" I hear Axel say uncertainly.

"Sure bro, just...let me check in with my parents, 'kay?" I respond, somewhat distracted.

And without another word, I hang up.

*******

I look at the reflection in the mirror. My coffee-brown hair is sticking up in all directions, my blue eyes stared back at me. 'Get a grip JT,' I scold myself.

I gripped the edge of the sink for a split second I can't see anything. The moment passes as quickly as it came but it leaves me trembling. I was exhausted, I couldn't sleep last night after the dream.

What is happening? I didn't understand why the dream triggered me so much. I can't exactly explain what was happening...ever since then I've been having a strange feeling.

Something's off.

Something in the back of my head is nagging at me, I can feel like I'm just on the top of the mountain ready to jump off.

But with no parachute.

The damn phone rings again, blasting Taylor swift.

"What Axel!!!!" I all but scream into the phone.

"Well damn Prince James, didn't mean to step on your toes!" Axel snickers.

"What do you want?" I say through gritted teeth.

"Did you lose your crown?" He taunts.

"Bye Axel!" I say annoyed.

"WAIT! Okay sorry dude, just calling to say I'm picking you up," he says.

"Couldn't you have texted me?" I say faintly annoyed.

"Yeah but I know how excited you get when you heart Taylor Swift singing," he laughs.

"bye!!!!" I say rolling my eyes even though he can't see me, while I hang up.

I run downstairs hoping I was making the right decision.