A Secret

Questions

I push through the crowded mansion, if I thought it was suffocating before, I was close to dying now. 'You were just observing him," I mentally tell myself,"don't get bothered by it, you were a good friend doing a kind act and helping him out."

Someone taps my shoulder and I jump, only to realize it's Axel.

"Dude where have you been?" Axel shouts over the music.

"Where have you been? I've been looking for you and Mike but you guys just ditched me," I say accusingly.

"That's not true," Axel says indignantly,"are you trying to avoid my question?"

"No I'm being serious, I actually thought you guys ditched me," I say laughing.

"Well I bet your glad we did, cause now your one step away from losing your virginity," he says snickering.

"What..?" I say, completely clueless.

"C'mon dude, I saw you walk out of that room, your face was completely priceless. It was like the what-the-fuck-have-i-done face, was it that great?" He says, smirking.

"For your information, I was with Loui," I say rolling my eyes.

"Didn't know you had a thing for British guys," Axel says doubling over with laughter.

"What the hell, Axel. People can go inside a room and not just have sex," I say rolling my eyes again.

"Yeah, sure, whatever you say your highness," he says laughing.

"Okay well I'm leaving, bye," I say while walking away.

"Wait JT! JAMES, HEY!!!" he yells after me.

I grab my phone from my pocket and text my mother to pick me up because I wasn't in the mood to have a 3 hour walk home.

                                    ********

"How was the party, James," my mom asks as soon as I set foot into the car.

"Great," I say unenthusiastically.

"Where's Axel, does he need a ride home?" She asks.

"No, no I'm sure he's fine," I say faintly annoyed.

"You didn't trick me did you? Just to come to this party?" She asks suspiciously.

"You know I would never do that mother," I say, faintly annoyed.

"You know you can tell me anything James," she says suddenly.

I stare at her even though her eyes are glued to the road. That was so sudden...could she tell something was up? Must be the famous "mothers intuition."

"You know I would, I do trust you," I say.

"I understand, it's just you know how hard it is for your brother to open up. Even though I encourage him more, I just want you to know you can come to me whenever you want," she says softly.

"Thanks," I say, staring out the window at the darkened silhouettes outside.

******

I sit cross-legged on my bed, staring at my computer screen. In books I've read people always solve problems by asking on the web, so Im seriously considering trying.