Quiet ¦ Hyungwonho

Chapter 8

Grab your tissues.

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Wonho's POV

To say I was mad was an understatement. Although I was drunk last night I remembered everything clearly. The fact that Hyungwon didn't understand that he was the reason I got drunk last night means that he didn't care about it.

We had to do that photoshoot and I couldn't fight my fear so even if I was mad, I didn't stop talking. When we got in the car, I stopped talking trying to calm myself but I was more scared that ever. But as our trainer told us "We have to be fearless to become models. No one is going to care if you are afraid. The only thing they want is to get the perfect photos and to get paid". Now I know this is inhuman, but this is what we signed up for.

We finally arrived and we were about to take the elevator to the roof when my anxiety decided to hit me.. I started panicking and trembling, I fell to the ground and trying to breath.. That's when I remembered.. I forgot my anxiety pills that I am supposed to always bring with me. I couldn't understand what was going on around me.

"I... I-I for-got my-my p-pills"

Hyungwon's POV

When we saw Wonho falling down we all bent down to help him, trying to sooth him. When he told us about his pills, I finally remembered.

"Oh my God, I'm so stupid. Here.. Here I have his pills I took them with me in case this happened" I said and pulled out the pack of pills. How can I be that stupid? I gave one to him and a bottle of water. We were late for the photoshoot but who cares, my best friend almost died. He tried lifting him up and he was about to lean on me when Shownu caught him and made him lean on him.

"He is heavy for you to carry. It's better if I carry him instead" Shownu said and went into the elevator. I know I'm not that strong but what happened bothered me. I wanted Wonho to relax because I was the one holding him. Jealousy? No, I just feel sad that he was mad at me.

When we actually made it to the roof our whole crew looked like they were gonna kill us.

"

Where were you?!" that photographer practically yelled.

"There was a problem while coming here and we couldn't do anything but be late" Kihyun explained to her.

"We don't care about your problem. This shows how irresponsible you are and that you take our words for granted" she wold us with clearly annoyed.

"I'm sorry but one of us almost died because we had to come HERE." I told them, I was furious. I would get it if we had some stupid excuse.

"Wouldn't you care if you lost one of your top models or something?" I yelled and everyone turned to look at me. They knew it was true so everyone stopped talking and they told us to get ready. I felt happy through my anger.
*

*

After we finished the photoshoot I was just sitting there admiring the view while the other boys were at the restaurant downstairs.

"Thanks for saying all those things earlier. If you didn't, I would probably get kicked out" Wonho came from behind sighing.

"It's okay. I just said the truth. Honestly it's frustrating how they treat us." I told him not looking at anything but the sky.

He just sat there, by my side watching the stars from above.

"You know how they say, when someone dies, they become stars in the sky. I know that's not true but sometimes it feel good to know that my brother is somewhere up there." I told him quite suddenly catching him off guard.

"Your brother is dead?" He asked me and I just nodded.

"Many people think I had the best childhood and I did have it. At least before my older brother died." I have gotten over it.. I guess this is what God wanted for him.

"I really admire you Hyungwon. Honestly, you are always so quiet but so caring, so pure like a child, not in the wrong way. My family..." I was listening to his voice being so close to crying and I know I was in that state too.

"You don't have to say anything if you are not comfortable"

"No, no. I have to tell someone or else I'm gonna explode. Since I was little we wouldn't have the typical family evenings. But we still had our moments. When I grew up, I decided to come out as bisexual to my parents. I thought at least my mom would support me. Dad decided to leave us that night. He left us a note saying how much he loved mom but he couldn't live with the disgrace of a son I was. Since that day mom would always blame me, for everything. She didn't care or at least this what she wanted to show me. When I told her that I would leave home to become a model, she cried, she told me she doesn't want mee to leave. But I had already made my decision and when she understood that she couldn't change my decision she told me she wanted to spend the last days together. I thought she meant the last days before I leave. But she... " he took a deep breath trying to trap his tears in his eyes and I shifted closer, squeezing his hand to show him that he can continue when he feels like it.

"3 days before coming here, I was returning from work when I found another note on the kitchen table. Saying.... How s-she was really sorry. But she couldn't deal with it anymore. She left.. But she could never come back." by now his tears were like waterfalls on his cheeks. This sight broke my heart. I know Wonho was vulnerable but I could never imagine this.

"Can I.. Ask you something?" he nodded "Why don't you want us to call you..." I debated in my mind if I should say the name or not.

"Hoseok? The last night we spent together she told me that my name was her favorite because she reminded her warmth. That she had combined it with my smile. And I.. It always reminds me of her" he told me and now I finally understand everything.

I turned his way and hugged him like I haven't hugged anyone. But this is what he needed right now. Comfort. And who can comfort him better than his best friend?

We stayed like this for about an hour when we decided to meet the other boys so we can finally leave. After all this crying we both needed sleep..

Don't worry Wonho. I'm gonna fix you.