(Haha this makes NO sense, I'm sorry)
Everything is as it always is.
But off somehow.
How peculiar, how strange, how odd.
The person in my mirror is no more than an acquaintance.
A passing presence.
Not me, not me, not me, not me.
My words, my movements are not my own.
Who am I really?
I am a concept.
I am a presence.
I am nothing but regret.
I am nothing but hatred, and bitterness, and revulsion, and tears, and I do not remember why I am crying.
I just know that these tears are not my own.
It's so odd
To feel as if you are possessing your own body.
I speak,
But it isn't me who is speaking.
Who then?
I don't know.
I don't know who I am.
I don't know why I am who I am.
If every human is just a result of combinations of differing variables how can anyone really be blamed for their actions?
In that case I cannot be blamed for who I am.
Is this just my way of shirking the guilt of a failed existence?
Maybe.
It is a fact that I've made choices that have influenced my path in life.
But it is also a fact that those choices were influenced by experiences that I had no control over.
That is what this is.
A lack of control.
I'm spiraling and spiraling away from who I intended to be, so I have mentally rejected who I have become.
Maybe if I was different
Maybe if I was better
Then I would not be where I am right now
The problem is that I actually am where I am right now and there is nothing I can do to change it except move forward.
Though I may be governed by my past, I have the freedom to claim my future.
I am not solely comprised of my mistakes.
I am also infinite, infinite
Opportunities.
