I lost my mom in a department store.
I really am too old to start crying right now,
The But I really don't think that I will.
Getting lost now is so much different from when I was younger.
Where there was once abandonment, now there is freedom.
I'll call her in five minutes and learn that she's waiting for my brother to try on clothes,
but in those five minutes I relish in the fact that I am completely alone.
No one who knows me knows exactly where I am.
Here among the checkered button downs, time seems oddly within my control.
It seems like I could fade away forever into this moment if I wanted.
Disappearing now is so much different from when I was younger.
Where there was once a slowly growing panic, now there is a slight temptation.
I could just sit down at the feet of this collection of mannequins and wait.
And never stop waiting.
