Wild Girl ✔️

chapter 21: promise

Rose

Each step I took felt as if it were weighed down by an anchor as I left Sebastian alone in the clearing. I returned to my cabin in a frenzy, sitting down on the porch steps to regain my breath and process the events of the last twenty-four hours. The sun began to set in the sky as I waited for him to return, smiling because the woman he loved had returned to him.

If only the man I loved could return to me, too.

Eventually the sky was no longer blue, but a pale orange that welcomed the moon and the stars that would soon shine. It felt like hours had passed when a figure emerged from the tree line. My head snapped upwards instantly, eyes locking on his.

Sebastian was too far away for me to make out his expression. Instead, I analyzed the way he walked, the way his hands were shoved carelessly into his pockets and how his hair was now tied up. But none of that was enough to tell me what had happened in the clearing.

When he was closer, I saw the hard lines of his jaw, the slump in his shoulders and the furrow in his brow. His face was utterly expressionless, a masked formed by a pro to hide whatever he was truly feeling.

I recognized it because I, too, had mastered that look.

I stood up instantly as Sebastian stood in front of the porch. Slowly, I walked down each step until I was standing beside him, waiting for him to speak. His eyes were focused on something behind me, refusing to look my way.

"Sebastian? I asked softly, waving a hand in front of his face. "What happened? Did she... show up?" With that, his gaze met mine, and I already knew the answer from the emptiness I saw in his eyes.

He shook his head slowly, bitting his bottom lip as it began to quiver. "She's gone," he said, two words that had heartbreak written onto his face.

I felt my heart ache for him as I pulled Sebastian into me, wrapping my arms around his chest in what I hoped was reassurance. It took a moment for me to realize that his hands remained shoved into his pockets, instead of looping around my body. I pulled away hesitantly and studied his face.

"Sebastian—"

"I know it shouldn't hurt like this," he interrupted, speaking with closed eyes. "But when Violet died, it was like she never really left because I got to cling on to an image of her, Rose." His eyes opened slowly, finding their way back to mine, dark enough that my breath caught. "But now it feels like losing her all over again. Now," he began, his voice breaking. "Now she's not coming back."

And Sebastian, I realized, had lost the person he loved twice in his life  — once two years ago, and again this afternoon. I tried to imagine what it would feel like to lose Caleb another time. Part of me knew I wouldn't survive that.

"It's my fault," he whispered. "I shouldn't have yelled at her. I shouldn't have told her that I didn't love her anymore."

I placed my hand on his arm. "You told her the truth, Sebastian. You owe it to yourself to move on, too. You can't keep living in the past."

Sebastian took a curt step backwards until my arm fell away. "You don't understand," he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yeah, I do. You feel like you're drowning in pain, lost in the middle of an ocean and you can't remember how to swim. I know how much it hurts, Sebastian. And how sometimes you think, hey, maybe it wouldn't be so bad if the water pulled me under. But, listen to me," I demanded, moving closer to him. "Pain is temporary. So is the sadness and every other burden you're carrying with you right now. Eventually, you'll remember how to swim again. You'll be okay."

Sebastian watched me with raised eyebrows as I shuffled awkwardly, having revealed a part of myself I didn't even know existed. And, I realized, that I was beginning to learn how to swim again. That I fought the water and I won.

As I waited for Sebastian to speak, the side of his mouth curved up into an uneven smile. I furrowed my brow. "What?"

"Nothing," he said quickly, dismissing it with a shake of his head. "It's just... I think I may have found out what your secret is, Rose."

I felt my cheeks begin to warm up because of the way he was watching me — his gaze burned into my body and it startled me how quickly the pain had vanished from his eyes, replaced by something much more alive.

I managed a forced laugh. "Impossible."

My heart fluttered as Sebastian took a step closer to me, then my heart turned into a a full blown sprint when his hands reached down and gently grabbed mine.

"Thank you," he said, "for today. For wanting to help me and for understanding, somehow, what all of this feels like." His voice dropped to a mere whisper when he spoke again. "And for the kiss, Rose. Kissing you is... it feels like a promise. That a better, happier future is possible."

A promise, I repeated in my head, rolling the word over and nodding at how right it felt. Maybe Sebastian and I weren't as damaged as I once thought — maybe we were simply broken, because broken has the ability to be fixed.

"I feel it, too," I confessed, managing a small smile as his thumb stroked my hand softly. Sebastian's fingers reached upwards, brushing gently across my face as I closed my eyes to his touch. It felt like heat — it felt alive.

"I want to know your secrets, Rose," he said, his breath hitting my face as my body began to sway. "I want to know everything about you, the good and the bad. And I want you to know that whatever it may be," he stopped suddenly, grabbing my chin in his hand. "Look at me, please."

My eyes fluttered open instantly to find his face merely inches away, staring down at me with a burning intensity that made a summer's warmth spread through me.

"I want you to know," he continued, "that whatever you think is going to scare me away, that it can't be worse than what I've told you," he added with a smirk. "And, that it won't change how I think of you, Rose. Because I do think you're incredible, and I want to know everything else I'm missing."

As Sebastian spoke, I merely nodded, feeling completely frozen in place. I was in a trance, held captive by his stare and his words that made my skin burn. I wanted to reach upwards, to crush my mouth to his and forget how to breathe — how to think — but I stood there, staring at the man and the promises he offered as he waited for me to simply accept.

"Okay," I breathed, biting down on my lip to stop the smile begging to break out.

"Good," he said casually, taking a step back and returning his hands into his jean pockets. "You know where to find me when you're ready," Sebastian said with an easy smile.

I watched as he walked away to his cabin, and as he climbed the steps and closed the door behind him, not before he glanced back at me and waved, a simple gesture that somehow let me know that I was going to be alright.

When my feet were able to move again, I walked into my cabin, picked up the luggage that was still leaning against the wall and unpacked all of my belongings, stuffing them away into my bedroom.

Sebastian's promise replayed in my mind, reminding me that it was far too early to leave this inn. Because I knew I was not fully healed yet, but something told me that with his help, I could be.

And that, was the start.

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hi guys. hope you enjoyed this chapter. i loved writing it :) while you wait for an update, i just published a new story titled Forever August. feel free to check it out & lmk your thoughts x