Considered A Disorder ~Septiplier

Understanding

Jack's pov~

  As I walked into Mark and I's dorm room, I plopped down onto my bed face down and started breaking down crying. Thoughts of my father ran through my head quickly. His voice, his looks,
   his hands..

The thought of my father hitting me made me cry more.
 
  "Fucking fag learn to take a hit once in a while.. no wonder you're gay! You must enjoy being hit by all the boys! Huh? Is that right you worthless fag?!" I shook my head no even though I knew no one was there to see. It still felt like his hands we driving into my ribs over and over..
 
  "Well I'll teach you to take a hit.. Maybe that'll get the disgusting thoughts to go away you flower boy!"

  *Knock knock*

  I was thrown out of my head as I heard the light rapping on the door. My breathing stopped and all that continued was some leftover tears from my eyes. I waited for it to go away but it only continued. That continuous light knocking on the door.

  *Knock knock*

  "Come in.." My voice was cracky and dry as it came out but I just hoped the person had heard me.

*Click*
  The door opened and I could hear light footsteps patter towards the side of my bed. The person lowered their hand down to the small of my back slowly. Making every muscle in my body tense.

  "Hey shh.. It's alright it's just me, relax.." Mark's calm deep voice helped me release the tension in my body. I felt comforted as he gently started to rub my back repeating that it's alright and to calm down.

  "Thank you.." My voice came out as a whisper but I didn't have the energy to say much more than that.

  "Don't thank me I'm just doing what's right. Try to calm down a little bit more alright take your time." He continued to trace shapes into my back relaxing me easily.

  "Do you think you could sit up? So your not so muffled and can actually breath?" He let out an airy light-hearted laugh. I shook my head slowly, not wanting him to see me a mess.

  "Aww come on pleaseeeee... For me? I won't care about you being a mess, I just wanna see that adorable face..." I sighed and slowly sat up facing Mark keeping my eyes down towards my hands that were held together in my lap.

  "Look at me? How am I supposed to know your not a dead if I can't see those precious eyes hmm?" I smiled slightly and looked up at him. His brown eyes striking me strongly in my heart. My facial expression went blank as all I could think about is how handsome this boy is..

  "What? Do I have something on my face? Food? Sauce? Cockroach?! Not a cockroach I hate those things.." I giggled and shook my head. How is he making me so happy?

  "No it's just your eyes are so calming to me for some reason." I looked back down quickly, blushing quite a bit.

  A finger is put under my chin as he lifts my head up. My heart stopped as we were only a few inches away from my face. His eyes staring right into mine.

  "Don't look back down alright?" His voice had gotten deeper and more controlling. His r's rolling almost sounding like a sort of purr that I yearned to hear more of. All I could do was nod my head, hypnotized by the whole situation.

  "Wanna tell me why you ran out on me?" His voice was gentle and not demanding this time.

  I shook my head slowly hopeing he wasn't mad at me.

  "Alright then that's fine.. Just know I understand and am here for you.." I nodded smiling in a kind of awkward way. Then a very idea came to mind..

  "H-hey.. uh sometimes being held by someone helps me calm down alot.. do you think m-maybe I uh.." I coughed awkwardly and looked down sighing in frustration because who would ever want to do that with someone like me..

  Strong arms enveloped around me holding me close. I smiled as he slowly started to lay us down. He put me into the blanket of warmth that was his chest and held me there gently...