The Girl Called Alice

2. her call

I sat on a bench. People passing by me as usually.

Some very few gave me a quick glance before they rushed away.

My dog Henry laid next to me and observed all the living creatures which called his attention including humans, bugs, dogs and so on.

I passed my time by drawing a picture of the cherry blossom tree right ahead of me. It was beautiful with all its light pink petals.

I've always felt like it was snowing when I stood under the tree and the wind gently brushed the petals so that they were carried away.

The air was chilly so I still had to wear a scarf but everything around screamed for spring. Flowers were springing out of the ground and I sat here experiencing nature's beauty which so many just could not see as they were to busy existing.

But I... I spent this moment living, not just existing.

I was swept away by my feelings that I did not notice my phone was ringing. Only when Henry barked next to me I was brought back to reality.

My best and only friend Leslie was calling a crazy fellow who unlike me was seen and adored by almost anyone. She had this typically bright personality that actually no one could not fall in love with her.

Which was probably also the reason she was a journalist in a really cool company while I sold pastries to make a living.

I was never good at anything and most of the people at my job interview told me I was too shy and plain to make it in their company. So I had to be happy with my job as pastry seller.

But I would never complain since my chef was amazing and I could eat as many pastries I'd want without paying for them.

"Leslie?" I asked. Monday was my free day since I had to work on Saturday but Leslie was working today as usually.

"Oh my god you won't believe me but I actually got a us two an invitation to the black n white masquerade party" she squeaked and I could imagine her jumping up and down in excitement right now.

"O...okay?!" I commented slightly confused. I mean I knew what the black n white masquerade party was but I did not know why an invitation made her that happy.

"Aren't you excited?" She asked me hiding her disappointment caused by my reaction.

"Well yeah totally but why for us both. I mean I could totally imagine you there but I do not fit into a party like that" I explained slowly.

"You're so boring" Leslie shouted so loud I had to move my phone away from my ear to prevent it from a hearing damage.

The black n white masquerade party was a party were like all those high class people and even some celebrities went to party. It was insanely expensive and I actually did not want to go there. It was just to.... to... to high class.

Usually those people were complete snobs or assholes, no one I would want to meet.

"Come one maybe you'll find someone to your liking. Or maybe you find like the one ?!!" She was way to excited but at least she had enough for us both. "Please, please, please, please, please" she begged.

I sighed since I knew I still owed her something for saving my ass last month when""" my salary came a bit late but I had to pay the rent.

"Alright." I gave up. "I'm coming with you"

"Really? Like really?" she asked almost a little too excited.

I nodded only to notice that she could not see through the cellphone and quickly said "Yes, I will"

"Gosh. Awesome. I will pick you up at 7p.m. on Saturday. Be sure to be ready" she laughed in a very melodic way that I could only be jealous of her laughter. I mean how come that a great person such as Leslie has not met her prince charming. If I were a boy she could be my dream girl. She has a bright personality, is funny, very beautiful and intelligent, simply perfect.

"But Leslie wait" I shouted shocked. "I... I have nothing to wear. I mean I do not even own a mask and it is a masquerade!"

She laughed gently. "Don't worry honey. You'll wear something from me. And my company buys the masks since I'm only attending this event to write an article about it"

"Okay" I mumbled and we hung up since Leslie had to continue working and I wanted to finish my drawing so I could go home since Henry showed signs of boredom.

I quickly finished a few lines so I could add details later without changing the tree's silhouette.

Henry seemed to be more than relieves when I finally got up and made for home.

"Mum I'm home" I announced myself and placed my bag in my room.

My brother was in school. Honestly I often wished to live on my own but since my mum was incapable of working after she had this accident during work.

She only got a little money but not enough to make a living for her and Mylo, my brother. So I did everything I could to support them.

"Hello sweety" she smiled very heartwarming. I was always shocked seeing how old she looked with the wrinkles around her eyes and the deep frowns on her forehead.

Nowadays it happened more often that she looked weak and vulnerable. I could not stand the thought of losing her. But I was so worried.

To a point were I became frustrated because I could not even fulfill her biggest wish. She always tells me indirect how much she wishes for me to find a person who appreciates me for who I am and someone I could live with when she is gone.

But by being invisible I doubt that I might find someone who will be able to love me, no I doubt I will find a male human being who even sees me.

I've been through so many frustrating experiences where I really tried to approach men but I was left with nothing than a big gulf in my heart which filled itself with disappointment and desperation shortly after.

Men just were not made for me or I wasn't made for them. Don't know which way around.

Mum was about to clean the dishes as I entered the kitchen.

"And?" She asked. "What did you draw?" I felt the sadness in her voice. She didn't want me to be alone.

"I drew a tree" I answered. Gosh that sounded boring. "And Leslie called me. She wants me to go to a party with her"

A spark lit in her eyes as I told her that. I mostly also avoided people to a point where it might not be healthy anymore but I was fine with that.

I tried to persuade myself that I had enough lovely people in my life and that I did not need anyone else. But that was just wrong and deep inside me I knew that. I was longing for that one person which would not want to show up.

"I'll help you" I told her and took a towel to dry the plates. I felt better after helping my mum.

It has been two years since I graduated high school but I was still trying to enter a university. I've been declined so far for whatever reason. Maybe because you always had to include a photo of yourself.

My biggest dream was to become a writer but my stories had always been so horrible that even Leslie couldn't lie to me about that. My present plan was to study veterinary medicine but yeah find a university which run that subject and hasn't declined me yet.

I was so frustrated that I couldn't even pursue my own dreams. All I did was cause my mum to worry which she already did too much.

"I'll go to my room..." I said and added in my thought ... and I'll be there for the rest of my life.