Musings of a Nobody

To the boy I used to know.

I think I liked you better when your favorite band was Lincoln Park and you wanted to bring a bomb to school.
I could see it then, the rawness. Every now and then you would let that mask slip away and I would get to see the real and wild edge to your soul.
Letting it shine for just a minute or two every now and then, keeping the animal in me intrigued before tucking it back away to the abysmal corners of your mind to sit in wait.
It was harder to hide then, but now that mask has become concrete in which you smother that vulnerability with practiced ease.
I see it sometimes, that wreckless vivacity shining bright through your eyes when you cannot help it. That all consuming abandon to face every corner of the world just to feel the blood pumping through your veins.
It is that life behind the containment that I seek, that dangerous fall of the facade that I so dearly crave. But it is dying within you and I cannot bare to watch any longer.