Angel Of Music

Chapter 8.

"Ugh, I feel like a parent!" Tarja groaned, collapsing on the sofa and brushing her forearm across her forehead.
"Me too," Tuomas joined her, equally tired. They sat in silence for a few moments before Tuomas spoke up again.
"Have you ever thought about having children?" He questioned, smiling slightly. Tarja turned her head and looked at him, surprised.
"Not yet. Maybe when I'm famous and have steady career and all... Maybe then. Why?"
Tuomas shrugged.
"Have you?" Tarja asked.
"Well, first I need a girlfriend for that and I'm not really interested in relationships right now." The second those words escaped his lips, he slapped himself mentally, for the woman's expression changed rapidly. Her face fell and she turned away, hiding disappointment that showed on her face. And I was stupid enough to believe he was into me! Why - he's trying to be nothing but a friend! And I was ready to kiss him! And to- to sleep with him, even! Tuomas fidgeted in his seat. What drove him to say that? Why had he acted like a dumb schoolgirl, telling her he was not interested when all he wanted was her? And he could tell by her face that he disappointed her. That look in her eyes - the hurt pride and resent made the pit of his stomach grow cold. I fucked up. He thought again and again. I fucked up.
"Well," said Tarja, turning her face to him after seconds that seemed like eternity to Tuomas "you'll think about it when you get a girlfriend." She smiled, but only with lips. Not a hint of smile reached her eyes. After that, they mostly sat in silence, both thinking about their own stuff and both praying that Agnes would come soon and save them from this awkward situation. Only once Tarja spoke up.
"You can go if you want to." She said, not looking at him.
"Nah, it's fine. I'll wait."

Finally, after what felt like aeons, Agnes returned. After reporting everything to her, Tarja declared that she would go and get some sleep now and Tuomas said he'd follow too because his car was parked in front of her house. Just when they were letting themselves out, the two heard Agnes' voice.
"Tarja?"
"Yeah?"
"Next time please try to put on the diaper the right way on the child, okay?" Agnes laughed and Tarja rolled her eyes.
"There will be no next time." She said, opening the door and walking out. Tuomas followed her.
"Hey, Tarja," He said when they approached her house.
"Yeah?"
"I haven't done anything to upset you, have I?" The man asked anxiously.
"No, not at all." Tarja gave back in a coldest tone she could muster.

Things between Tarja and Tuomas cooled down. They met only twice after that evening and both times by accident. After deciding that she should distance herself from him, both times Tarja was cool and polite. She was distancing herself from him and he, understanding that he messed up, decided to give her time. He was sure that after some time Tarja would return to her cheerful self. And she did. But not around him. With him, she was acting like a polite stranger and that hurt Tuomas more than accusations and yelling would. He hadn't regretted anything in his life more than he regretted those words that made Tarja grow cold towards him. Tuomas didn't lose hope, but after running into her at the store for the third time, he understood that she was planning on acting like a stranger for the rest of their lives.  After waiting for a long time and understanding that she wouldn't "just forgive" him, the man decided to take matters into his own hands.

Tarja had just finished rehearsing for the concert she was to have the next day, and was standing in her changing room, getting ready to leave when somebody knocked loudly on her door.
"Who's there?" the woman asked, slightly surprised. She didn't expect anyone and the person she wanted the most to come probably didn't have time for her.
"It's me, Tuomas." The voice came and Tarja beamed. Her heart started fluttering like a bird. She took deep breaths to calm down before telling him to come in. She was still mad at him and only the fact that he came to see her wasn't enough to change her attitude. The door opened and Tuomas appeared, standing in the doorway and smiling sheepishly.
"May I come in?"
"I already told you to come in, didn't I?" Tarja said, setting her handbag on the chair. "What is it, Tuomas?"
The man entered the room and closed the door behind himself. He sunk into one of the chairs and smiled at the singer.
"Nothing. I've missed you." His eyes went over her figure and studied her face, lingering at her lips.
"Oh indeed?" Tarja gave back sarcastically.
"No, really. Apparently you've decided that we're not friends anymore but I don't agree with that." The keyboarder grinned and sat more comfortably. "Don't you think we have to discuss something?"
The woman couldn't hold back a smile. So she meant something to him, after all.
"I don't know what you're talking about," She said, regaining her straight facial expression.
"You're either a very good actress or you don't understand anything at all," Tuomas said sharply and stood up. He was hovering over her and she looked up into his face, a little lost. The man chuckled and stepped back. "For some strange reason you decided to be mad at me. No, don't interrupt me, I can see very well that you're upset. Either tell me what makes you so angry, or stop sulking." His face softened at the sight of her widened eyes. She didn't expect him to be so sharp with her and it scared her. "I'm sorry for being so cross," Tuomas added. "But I need clarification. I'm sorry for doing whatever I've done and hurting you. Forgive me."
Tarja laughed. Her heart was beating fast and she wanted to cry with joy after his speech. She realised that he valued her and the relationship they had and it filled her with happiness.
"Alright, I'm sorry for acting like this too," She said with a smile. Tuomas smiled back and stepped forward, pulling her into a hug. The woman hugged him back, resting her cheek against his chest and closing her eyes. It was so good to finally feel his embrace again, after those weeks of no contact with him at all. She had missed him too, she admitted to herself reluctantly. No matter how hard she'd tried to distance herself from him and destroy every feeling she had for him, she couldn't do it.
"So, what should we do?" Tuomas asked, pulling back and observing the smaller woman's face.
"No idea. Whatever you want." Tarja shrugged. It really didn't matter to her what they did, as long as they were together.
"Come on, think of something," The keyboarder demanded.
The woman frowned as she tried to come up with something fun to do, but her brain could only work in one direction - and it was kissing. Her mind was only filled with pictures of them kissing and she could think of nothing else. Little did she know, that Tuomas was in the similar situation. Suddenly, Tarja's face lit up.
"Do you want me to give you a tour around the opera building?"
"Do you think I haven't been inside the opera before?" Tuomas asked and grinned. Tarja stuck out her tongue at him.
"You wanted to do something, didn't you? Besides, this would be a tour of parts where visitors aren't allowed."
"I'm not sure it will be too interesting," Tuomas teased and Tarja crossed her arms on her chest.
"Fine then, suggest something else!"
"Okay, okay, I'm kidding." The keyboarder laughed and ruffled woman's hair and she scowled at him. His hands moved to her sides and soon she was squealing and laughing and begging him to stop until her eyes were full of tears.
"I should slap you for that," Tarja spat, straightening her hair and wiping away the tears. "You know I hate when people tickle me like that. Dumbass."
Tuomas merely ruffled her hair again and then threw his arm around her. "Come on now, give me a tour of the opera building."
The woman looked up at him, rolled her eyes and pinched his arm. "Let's go."

After showing Tuomas every possible corner of the building, Tarja decided to take him to the attic.
"Why the hell... are we climbing up there?!" The man panted out.
The singer didn't reply, she only gestured him to follow her.
When they finally managed to climb the endless stairs, Tarja took Tuomas' hand and confidently led him through the dark attic towards the small window.
"Do you know everything here by heart?" He asked.
"Yeah, I come up here quite often. Look," she opened the window and leaned on the window pane, "the city looks so beautiful from here."
Tuomas came forward and looked out too. "Wow." He whispered and leaned on the pane too. The window was narrow so his shoulder touched Tarja's and the woman smiled at the feeling.
"It's my favourite spot here, after the stage, of course." She said and sighed. "The view is amazing in any weather." She put her cheek against Tuomas' arm.
The two stood there for a while, not saying a word, both lost in their thoughts. Tarja, with her cheek still against Tuomas' arm, was thinking about how happy and calm she felt with him around and how she could stand endlessly there with him. Tuomas wondered what would happen if he turned around and kissed her right there and then. He didn't want to admit it, but he was scared. He had regained her friendship only that evening and he wasn't ready to lose it again. The man looked at Tarja. She was looking at the sky and smiling and his heart swelled with love he felt for her. Tuomas sighed, no, he wasn't ready to get rejected again. Yes, she had kissed him at the bar after the concert but he wasn't sure it really meant anything for her. On the other hand - she seemed really hurt when he said he wasn't interested in relationships. Maybe it was worth it, after all. Tuomas took a deep breath, grabbed Tarja's shoulder's and turned her around.
"Promise you won't get mad," He said as she looked up at him, her eyebrows raised.
"What?" She asked. Tuomas repeated and Tarja grinned. "Why?"
"Just promise," The man demanded.
"Okay... what is it?"
Tuomas grabbed her face with both of his hands and pressed his lips against hers. Taken by surprise, Tarja didn't react at first, but then her lips parted and she kissed him back. After a wonderful eternity they pulled apart.
"Let's go down, shall we? We're gonna freeze here." Tuomas suggested and Tarja nodded, breathless from happiness. She closed the window and grabbed his hand, leading him through the darkness back to the door.

"Aren't you going to tell me why you were mad at me?" Tuomas asked when they returned to Tarja's changing room.
"Nah it's stupid." Tarja gave back, turned her back at him and started rummaging in one of the drawers.
Tuomas circled her waist from the behind and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Tell me."
Tarja turned around in his arms and put her hands around his neck. "Well... That day, when you said you weren't interested in relationships, I thought you didn't want me at all... that's why I tried to put an end to our relationship."
He chuckled and kissed her forehead. "That was really foolish of me. I am quite fond of you, you know."
"Fond of me?"
"Actually I like you a lot." Tuomas whispered. Tarja scarcely had time to respond with "Me too" before he pressed his lips to hers. The slow and innocent kissing soon grew into a heated make out session. The keyboarder sat down on the nearest chair and pulled the woman into his lap. His lips moved from hers to her jaw and then her neck. Tarja sighed out and entangled her hand into Tuomas' bushy hair. "You're wonderful," He muttered, not taking his lips off her neck. She grabbed his face and sealed their lips with a kiss again, biting gently on his lower lip. He kissed back passionately, holding her waist with one hand and trailing the other one up and down her thigh. The sensation made Tarja's head spin, she had never felt anything similar with any man before and although she knew she wouldn't be able to control herself soon, she didn't make any attempt to stop Tuomas.
Suddenly a door flew open and the couple found themselves facing an elderly woman who stared at them as if she had seen a ghost.
"I'm sorry," She mumbled as soon as she came back to her senses and closed the door.