Keep On Hoping

chapter four

Where is it? It has to be here, they aren’t smart enough to hide the damn phone from me. I whispered as I quietly rummaged through the cabinets. My house was too small for it to be anywhere but in a cabinet or a drawer.  Shit, does my mother have it? I thought to myself. Except she wouldn’t have kept it on her would she? I mean what if an emergency were to happen at home, I mean Harold threw me into the exact spot the phone was that day he realized Shane knew everything. My mother didn’t care she didn’t get a new one, instead she gave me a cell phone, which I actually didn’t receive ‘til after Christmas last year.

                Harold was on a mini rampage that year Shane found out. I mean Shane has been sent to the hospital three times, and each excuse was either how he climbed a fence and fell, or how a baseball hit him in the face, actually he used that excuse all three times. Harold was more careful with them, he didn’t cause as much damage to him than me because he would have to hide it from his parents, which actually to think about it, my dad would be happy if his parents found out because then Shane would never be able to hang with him.

                Wait a minute! Instantly a thought

I quietly snuck up to my parent’s room.  Harold was in the living room watching some stupid basketball game. I could tell because he was screaming at the Celtics, how pathetic. As I got to the room I started to go through my mother’s draws. It must have been years since I’ve been in their bed, and it definitely shows they don’t take care of the room either.

                First off it smelt like vomit and beer everywhere. Glass bottles were lying around the one side of the bed near the window, which must be where Harold sleeps. Dirty clothes just lay around; I could definitely smell the odors of that! As I walked through the garbage I held my breath as long as possible.

                The phone had to be in here, like I said my mother was too stupid to keep it with her. The only place I was brave enough to check was the closet. As I rummaged through the boxes of crap that we never needed I found something shiny. I knew it had to have been my phone. As I dug deeper I could see my panda sticker that Shane got me out of the twenty-five-cent Machines. I always admired him for those stupid items that I would never really need, but he made me feel special so I loved it for that reason.

“What the hell are you doing?” I was tossed back into the bedroom. I luckily grabbed the phone from the pile which, through my spazing, I threw it out the door and next to the steps. “Again, I repeat, what the hell are you doing?”  Spit flew into my face as he pinned me onto the ground.

“I-I” I couldn’t even think on what to say, I just wanted to cry, why the hell would I think I could have gotten away with everything.

“Speak!” He slapped me, as my head turned to the side. My cheek, the same exact spot that his hit me last time, stung, tears started to fall down my face, I rarely cry in front of Harold, it shows weakness, and he cannot know I am weak. I will not allow it!

“You want to know what I’m doing.” I said with a firm voice.

“Tell me please!” He showed no emotions. I couldn’t tell if he was still angry or taunting me or worse….both.

“I’m finally taking a stand. You are no longer in control of me! I am sick of the way you treat me! I am not your toy; you cannot beat me up and toss me around! I won’t tolerate it!” I screamed at him

“You were right! You are better off dead, I’d be glad to take care of that.” He gave me a half crooked smile.

“Really, that’s your comeback? You don’t have the balls to kill me!” so much adrenaline was pumping through my veins that I didn’t even realize I just challenged the one guy who almost tried to kill me six years ago.