Shades of Dusk

The Color of Sunset on Your Skin

Despite the promise of talking, the two of them are silent as they walk back to the car. The silence becomes heavy, pressing in around them as they get into the car, but not uncomfortably so. The talking, upon unspoken agreement, will wait until they return to Forth's dorm.

Beam has been quiet the whole night, and Forth isn't sure how to fix it. He's been quiet since before they went to dinner, in fact, and part of Forth wants to track down that other student that had been with Beam at the library, and perhaps give some bruising encouragement to stay the hell away from his Beam.

He's more than a little aware of the looks that Beam has gotten for being with him; the disparaging comments that are made in Beam's direction, the snide remarks--despite what it may seem, Forth is definitely aware of it. He's tried his best to staunch the flow of them, but Beam hasn't been the only one on the receiving end of such comments. They don't tend to bother him, not really, because Beam's opinion matters more than anyone else's.

But Forth is also aware that there are times when Beam's opinion, especially of himself, isn't quite the most reliable.

This whole matter with his tattoos... He had wondered and worried if perhaps Beam didn't like his tattoos, but he dismissed that thought rather easily. It seems more that Beam doesn't really know what it is to have or to get a tattoo. But Beam was trying, and he has to appreciate that; he feels awful he'd shut the other man down at dinner.

Beam had been struggling, though, and he hates watching his partner struggle like that. Like he wasn't interested, but he knew Forth was, so he was trying to keep the conversation flowing. Thinking back on it, now, as he navigates through traffic to take them back to Forth's apartment, he is sure that it was more that Beam just didn't have any idea what he was supposed to ask, if anything.

It's easy, now, to reach across the small distance over the center console to gently take Beam's hand in his own, shooting the man a bright grin at the mildly disgruntled look Beam shoots him for the act. But Beam's lack of actual verbal protest, and the way Beam's fingers curl tightly in and around his own, speak volumes.

The car is quiet for the remainder of the trip, not even music playing from the radio. But the quiet is appreciated, this time; it gives Forth time to gather himself for the hard conversation that they're about to have. And, really, it won't be hard for Beam, but it will be for him.

He's never talked about it all before. Not with anyone who matters like Beam does.

When they finally get to his apartment, and the door has been closed and locked securely behind him, he feels like he's about to vibrate out of his skin with nerves. Beam has only let his hand go when they got out of the car, and more than anything Forth wants to reassure him that everything is okay. Will be okay.

"You don't have to do this," Beam tells him again what he'd said at the bridge, and Forth could kiss the man for his quiet understanding. Actually, he can, so he does, turning and gently pressing his lips to the corner of Beam's mouth, earning a surprised breath that sounds almost like it's been punched out of Beam.

"I know," Forth repeats in turn, smiling softly as he presses his forehead to Beam's temple, basking in the warmth just being in Beam's presence suffuses him with. "But I want to share this with you, if you want to know."

"I do," Beam agrees, almost instantly, making Forth's smile widen in reaction.

He shifts away, just enough to be able to look Beam in the eye, before he strips himself of both t-shirt and uniform outer shirt in one smooth motion. He smirks at the way color warms Beam's pale face, the way Beam's eyes widen and immediately track over the way his muscles move beneath tanned skin. He studies Beam's face, the smirk shifting into a small, lopsided smile as he finds himself staring.