melodrama||phan[book 2]

chapter 4*

a/n sorry this chapter is triggering, and i'm sorry i haven't updated in forever. i've had no motivation at all. also this chapter sucks soo i'm sorry. also this is unedited like always. 

dan was sad. he was high everyday, and cried every night. he just need to find a way to rid the pain that he felt when ever alex was by his side. although i had not known what alex did to him at the time, it was clear something just was not right. i had once said that the first time i had seen dan since our fall out was when we rekindled, but that is a lie. i had seen dan once before that, and i'm very thankful i did. you see, dan was in pain, suffering, and depression. he was used for his body all the time. no one truly cared like i did. everyone else in his life was a causal fuck, who discarded of him after they got their way with him. dan being constantly high did not help out his situation at all. he was giving up in life and didn't know what to do. all he knew was the pain that was once endurable became unbearable.

it was a rainy night, i was all alone since jensen had to work late. I could hear yelling from Dan's apartment, followed by a door slamming. i could hear dan yell and then something break, most likely a vase or a photo frame. at the time i had no clue what had happened, i only knew the events that had transpired afterwards. dan had told me, that it was another night of getting high with alex, except dan put up a fight when he had tried to use him. dan had said that alex hit him that night and then raped him. that's when the door slammed. the crashing glass, was a bottle of alcohol. dan hated life, he had no reason to carry on. he lit his last cigarette, but he was such a mess that he lit the wrong end. he started to wreck his apartment, throwing everything in sight. he went to his bathroom, digging around just trying to find something to help him relax. that's when he saw it. a bottle of unopened pills. he had remembered alex telling him that the wrong amount could kill him. he popped open the lid, and set them back down. he grabbed an unbroken glass and turned on the tap, filling the cup with water. he got a piece of paper, scribbling down words, that i wouldn't read until a year later. he grabbed a hand full of pills, popping them in his mouth. the high took over, but dan smiled a bit, knowing this would be the last time he'd feel high. dan eventually realized he didn't want to die, and that's when i received a knock on my door. 

"dan, what are you do-" i began to ask but never got to finish the question. 

"phil, i did something stupid." he said quickly. it was obvious he was high. "i really did mean to do it, but i don't want to anymore. you're the only person i thought of going to because you're the closest."

"dan! calm down. what happened, what did you do?"

"phil, i'm going to die. please do something, i don't want to die anymore. alex and i got into a fight and i took to many pills. just please do something phil." 

his eyes were tearful. i didn't know if he was just high or if he was about to die until he fell over. i went down by him, checking his pulse. it was faint but still there. i knew i had to act fast. so i quickly called an ambulance. soon i heard the sirens, and went to guide the paramedics to my apartment. once they had gotten dan, they asked me something that i didn't know how to answer. 

"would you like to ride with him to the hospital?"

"sure." i said without thinking. 

as much as dan would hate knowing i went with him, i couldn't just leave him alone. plus my heart was breaking seeing dan in this state. i held his hand the whole ride to the hospital. we when we arrived, that's when we were ripped apart. a nurse held me back, telling me i had to stay and wait in the waiting area. i knew this was alex's fault. ever since he had came into dan's life he had been more broken than before. i pulled my phone out and dialed the only person i knew would pick up.