The Storm Is Raging (Tomtord fanfiction)

♌Chapter Three♌

♡ Tom's POV ♡
     Tord left to his room a few moments earlier,  leaving me struggling to comprehend what he had just said.

Matt wouldn't replace me, I could get hugs whenever I wanted.

What did he mean by that statement?

Did he mean that he wouldn't fall for Matt but for him?

I shook off the idea, knowing we'll never be more than friends, sadly. I smile sadly at the thoughts of the future that lived in my imagination, the future I had drowned and washed away with alcohol. Along with the mesmerizing way of weather patterns. The future in which Tord and I were happily wed, cuddling during storms whispering sweet nothings in each other's arms. Being able to look into each other's eyes and see how passionately we love one another.

Snapping out of my trance, I noticed a tear streaming down my cheek. Glancing around the room to make sure no one saw me crying, I head to my room to cry in the comfort of my Tord doll. I had made a doll of Tord with a string on its back that once I pull it, it says something I could never forget. It says it in its soft Norwegian accent, the one I had grown to love with every atom of my being.

I love my little Tommy.

The sound of Tord speaking those words melts my heart, though he said that so long ago I know he'll have forgotten about those words that meant so little to him, and so much to me. He last said 'love' and 'Tommy' in the same sentence when we were seven, such a young age. Most likely we were too young to understand the true meaning of loving someone. Or at least how I depict love.

Being in love meant you would die to make sure the one you love is happy.

Not caring if they choose someone over you as long as it makes them happy.

Though, no matter how small those words were, I will never forget them. They relive in my imaginative future but as such, it is just my imagination. It's not real. And it never will be.

Clutching the doll close to my chest I let the tears stream freely, free of the bonds of hiding my emotions with a sturdy barrier that only the one I love can weaken and make the imprisoned tears run free. Choking out small, soft sobs, I close my eyes and hold the doll closer than I ever have.

Having Tord back should make me happy, right?

Wrong.

I don't have him the way I want to.

Yes, I am his shoulder to cry on.

But I want to be able to love him.

To kiss away his tears. 

To have the power to replace every tear with one of his adorably comforting giggles.

To be the main source of his soft smiles.

To be able to hear his gentle Norwegian accent saying, "I love you"

To be able to respond with the same words.

I bury my face in my pillow to muffle out the sobs that of which were progressively getting more and more violent by the second.

That was until they were stopped abruptly by the sound of a gentle two-pronged knock on my door.

At this point, I didn't care who saw me or what situation I was in.

All I care about is Tord. And that's all I ever will care about.

"Come in.. "

I speak with a scratchy voice, sitting up and wiping my tears.

The door opened to show a concerned Tord, he most likely must have heard me crying, for he asked,

"Are you okay, Tommy..? What's wrong..? "

I was afraid to speak, as in I was afraid that all of my thoughts about him would overflow and spill out, so I just pat the seat next to me with my hand, signalling for him to sit next to me.

He did as directed and sat down next to me. He put his arms around me and hugged me, he must have caught on to the fact that I didn't want to speak. I hugged him back and hid my face in his shoulder, thankful for his warmth. Though I do like storms, I don't like the cold, along with the fact that crying can make you colder.

He could tell I was sad, it was like an alarm in his brain. He knew that a hug would make me feel better. This is why I love him.

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Word count:  760