Entry Two
So where should I start today? I think I'll start with when I was little. Be warned though. It's not pretty, and it doesn't get much better. So I wasn't born as Lilly Marina. I was actually born as Lilly Nupart. My father, the Nupart, was in my life until I was six. Then my parents went through a divorce. Why did they divorce? Because of me, because of him.
It started when I was four before I started kindergarten. He came into my room one night. It was about midnight and I had been asleep for a while. I remember this night clear as day.
He came in and pulled the covers back. I was slowly coming to and saw the outline of his body.
"How's my little lily-pad?" he asked.
I didn't get a chance to respond before he laid down next to me.
"Let daddy make you feel good" he said, "and you can do the same for me"
He placed his hand on my thigh and moved upward as his other hand moved upward from my stomach. He pulled my underwear aside and stuck his fingers in. His other hand splayed across my undeveloped chest.
He never stuck his d*ck in me that night, or ever actually. I was still technically a virgin when he left my life, but I was never the same. He throat-f**ked me that night, and almost every night after that.
He came in almost every night for two years. Two years before anyone found out. I didn't know what he was doing was wrong.
"Don't tell lily-pad. It's our little secret" He would say.
One night after those two horrible years mom finally decided to get up. I still don't know why she got up that night. But for one of the few times in my life I am very grateful for her. She heard him grunting and she knew what that grunting meant.
She walked into my room and saw him, my father, with his d*ck in my mouth and his fingers in my...yea. She screamed bloody murder and kicked him to the curb that night. I never saw him again.
Lilly set her pen down when she heard her phone vibrate.
"Hello?"
"Hey Lilly! You ready for this party tonight?"
"Yea, totally."
"Great! See you in an hour"
"Kay, bye Madi"
"Bye"
Lilly collapsed back on her bed. It was so hard for her to relive that moment, but she needed to get it down on paper. But she had a party to get ready for now.
She went to her closet and pulled out a black bodycon dress from Forever 21 with a lace neckline. She quickly curled her hair in loose ringlets and did a smokey eye look with her makeup before getting dressed. She paired the dress with a pair of black heeled ankle boots.
She picked up Abigal and Madison and they turned their music up loud as they drove out to the party.
"I'm so ready for this!" Madison said as they walked up to the house. "I totally need a break from everything"
"Me too" Lilly said.
"Let's par-tay" Abigal yelled.
They made their way through the house to the kitchen where the drinks were. Abigal and Madison immediately grabbed alcohol. Lilly found some water and stuck with that since she had to drive home.
They made their way to the living room where most everyone was dancing, grinding to be specific. Madison jumped right in and the hands of some senior found their way to her hips pretty fast. Abigal pulled Lilly into the middle of the mass.
"Pretty Lilly!"
"Hey look it's pretty Lilly"
She heard a couple guys say and turned to face them. Dylan and Shaun, two of the hottest seniors, were standing there holding their red cups.
"Hey guys" Lilly said with a smile.
"You wanna dance?" Shaun asked.
"Umm I don't know"
"Aw come on"
"Sure I guess"
Shaun pulled her over to him just as a new song came on. He placed his hands on her hips and started grinding with her. She knew what to do. Obviously she wasn't new to these parties, just wasn't a big fan of them.
Lilly glanced around as they were doing this. She saw Chris chewing out the senior Madison had been dancing with holding Madison behind him. Abigal and Nicholas were close by watching this unfold.
Shaun's little buddy was growing harder against her ass as they continued to dance.
She saw other people grinding, some couples were against the wall making out. Some boys were leading girls upstairs. Some were couples and some weren't.
Then it felt like she just slammed into a brick wall. She stopped moving and the music was just a hum to her ears. Shaun kept grinding on her ass even though she wasn't moving.
He was standing there. Staring right back at her. A smirk slowly grows on his face as he recognizes her.
No she thought. No he can't be here. This can't be happening to me. He can't be here. Why is he here?
She pulled away from Shaun and started to make her way through the crowd.
"Lilly! Hey what's wrong?"
"I'm sorry, Shaun. I just need some fresh air"
"It's fine. Find me later?"
"I'll try" She said though she didn't mean it. She knew what he wanted.
Lilly made her way outside to the deck. There were a few other people out there, but they didn't seem to notice her.
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