Butterflies || [Harry Styles fanfiction]

Nineteen.

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this chapter is invisible sometimes, don't worry.

Harry's POV.

''Mr. Styles?'' I hear Dorotha's voice behind the door. I roll my eyes and sit on the bed waiting for her to step into the room. She's really annoying, and one of the reasons I joined the fraternity. She walks around this house with her fucking angry face, and it makes everyone else angry.

''Come in.'' I yell back and she opens the door.

''Your father called and wanted to know if you were in class.'' She says with a serious face and I shrug.'' I said you were, because I don't want your father to get angry.''

''Can you stop calling him my ''father''? He's not my fucking father.'' I spit out and she arches a brow.

''Don't swear.'' She says and fake a smile.

''I'll do whatever the fuck I want in my house. Now can you leave my room, please?'' I politely ask and she nods. ''And if anyone comes to see me, tell them I'm busy.'' She nods again closing the door behind her. Annoying.

I cover my face with my hands and stand up, heading to the bathroom. I've been feeling like shit for this whole month. I haven't seen Ciara, and she didn't bother to come to see me. I'm so angry. I don't want to see her. Never again. I opened my heart to her. Fuck, she's the first person in ages that knows how I'm feeling. And she ignored me. She probably thinks I'm fucked up. I don't blame her. I am. I've been playing with her since I met her. But I couldn't help it. I wanted to be with her, I wanted her to be mine, even though she couldn't be mine. And I knew it. I wanted to tell her about my fucked up family, about the wedding, and about everything, but I couldn't. I was afraid that she would leave me.

Indeed she did.

I wash my face and look at the mirror. My eyes are no longer red.

I brush my teeth and walk back to the room. I change into a pair of sweatpants, a hoodie, and sneakers. When I step out of my room something catches my attention. I see Zayn's car parked in front of my house. And suddenly, stepping out of it I see her.

I gasp, swallow, stop breathing. I look at her, how she smiles at Zayn, closing the car's door. 

The anger makes my blood boil in my veins, like venom. I don't want to fucking see her being happy. Well, I want her to be happy. I want to talk to her. I want to kiss her. But I don't want to face her, not after one fucking month. It's probably my fault, though. I mean, I was the one who walked away.

I'm fucked up in every single way.

I look again to remember she's with Zayn. Fucking Zayn. He took advantage of this situation. I knew he would though. Since the first time he laid his eyes on Ciara I knew he would try. I knew Niall was trying too, but Niall was different. He didn't take it seriously. He wasn't competition material so I wasn't that worried about him. I know Ciara isn't into him, and Niall knows that too, so he doesn't even try. But Zayn is different.

I feel my heart beating fast. What the fuck is wrong with me. She looks so freaking beautiful.

Stop Harry.

I shake my head and turn on my heels. Dorotha will tell her I'm not here, or that I'm busy. I don't really care.

I hear soft knocks on the door, and then Dorotha's shoes against the marble floor. I hear the door opening, followed by her annoying voice.

''What do you want?'' She asks rudely. Fucking Dorotha.

''I'm looking for Harry Styles.'' I hear her soft voice and in that moment I remember how much I've missed her.