Free

9. Charmed

Sadie

It's the end of another week now so my family and I were off to church as usual. The thing about our town is that it's so small, everything is walking distance. It was filled with many spacious residential areas and a large town square with short buildings so there wasn't really much to it. But the church, however, was just to the edge of the border so we always had to drive. For some reason I hated it.

Car rides with my family were a small confined and cramped space which I couldn't escape for a half an hour until we get there. It was always a chance for my family to pry and see what's happening in my life. I wished for silent car rides but those never happened. I always have to talk, it's frustrating.

Of course, today, they drilled me about good grades and my dance practice. As if I wasn't under enough pressure to win the competition already. So when we finally arrived, I wasn't in the best mood. A part of me was hoping to see Eli. Something about him caused a smile to creep onto my face. For some reason, even though I know the consequences, I wanted him to come up and talk to me.

As we walked down the huge cathedral hall and mingled with a few family friends, I kept my out for him. Unfortunately, I didn't see him. I still looked around but I couldn't find his face, so slightly disappointed, I followed my family to three empty seats near the front to wait patiently for the service to commence. 

On my way up to the pew, I feel someone's hand come in contact with mine and place something into it. I snap my head back quickly and see him. He pretends not to see me and walks by nonchalantly, to avoid getting noticed.

I open my hand momentarily as he walks by, saying nothing. Then I hide the crumpled piece of paper in between the elastic of my black skirt and my shirt, quickly rushing over to get a seat next to my parents before they notice. I wanted to read it before the service began so I quickly opened it carefully, making sure no one can see.

"I like your dancing."

I grin stupidly. This fool really went through all of this trouble just to tell me he likes my dancing. I looked over a few rows ahead and I saw him, now sitting with his presumable family. His father seemed to be talking down to him by his facial expressions. I also saw an adorable little boy sitting right beside him.

Eli appeared very proper and well groomed. I love seeing this side of him. His dark brown hair was nicely brushed and his blue shirt meticulously tucked into his pants. My eyes grazed his pants when we all had to stand. I tried to focus but I couldn't help but stare at his adorable concentration face.

He had really gorgeous facial features. As Anna would say, he's a real 'panty-dropper'. I find it hard to disagree with her in this case. The way the sun shined on his dark brown eyes and the subtle dimples in his cheeks whenever he would look over at his brother. He also had a very prominent jawline, and I noticed how his Adam's apple would bob when he would gulp. 

He was also wearing his glasses today and for some reason, I really liked the way they accented his face so perfectly.

I've never really stopped to analyze the male anatomy like this, I just think he looks nice. Mother always told me to never stare at a man for more than 10 seconds, and I'm pretty sure it been about a minute now so I had to look away.

I just wish I didn't have to leave like that the other night. Despite the way I was acting, I really wanted to talk to him. I just don't know how to express myself properly sometimes. On the dance floor, no problem. But with people, it's much harder.

I always say the wrong thing and end up sounding stupid. My friends never have this problem it seems. Every time we would hang out they would try to push me to get with some guy, because let's just say, I'm not as experienced as they are.

Truthfully I'm scared. I don't know what to do. With my hands or my mouth, I'm just not ready. I've never really done anything with the opposite gender, my whole life I haven't exactly been exposed to it.

Every time I've tried I've just chickened out and left.

For Anna, Claire, and Paige it's just second nature. Of course, the circumstances at school don't exactly allow us to learn how to talk to males but still. Guys are just naturally attracted to them and they're so casual about it. They can hook up with anyone anytime and not even think twice about it.

It's fun for them.

For some reason, I don't find meaningless sex amusing. Call me old-fashioned but I want monogamy.

Don't get me wrong, this whole no sex until marriage concept that everyone is preaching in my ear is not appealing to me either. Especially if the guy my mom picks, I can't connect with.

I want someone who truly loves me and whom I love and want to spend the rest of my life with. Not just some arranged marriage like it's some business proposal.

There are just some things you can't change.

~

My thoughts took over my mind for the rest of the reception, then it was time to roll out as usual and head back home.

Once I finished my Sunday chores I begged my parents to let me hang out with Anna. After 10 minutes of groveling, they finally let me go and I escaped the house with a promise to keep them updated on my location every hour.

I went over to Anna's house because her parents were out, as usual. So she took it upon herself to raid her dad's liquor cabinet and grab one of the most expensive bottles I have ever seen. "So who was that guy the other night?" She asks while running her nimble fingers across all the other bottles on the shelf.

"What guy?" I ask.

"Why are you playing dumb?" She gives me an amused look. "Did something happen between you two?" She inches closer, shutting the cabinet loudly.

"No Anna. He just said he wants to get to know me." I shrug.

"Interesting," Anna smirks. "And do you like him?"

"I don't know."

"I think you do." She says. "If you didn't you would be running for the hills right now, you hate breaking rules." She smiles all-knowingly.

"You should talk to him." She concludes and I just think to myself; She does have a point, the old me would be too scared of getting caught to even talk to Eli. So maybe she's right.

I like Eli.

Sorry if the chapters have a lot of mistakes, the book is still under a lot of editing and it's not finished yet :)