Sunshine in the Summer (Ashton Irwin)

Chapter 22

“I forgot how much I love this movie,” I said. We were lying on the couch, cuddled together with your arms around me.

I felt your breath on my head as you laughed softly. “I watch it more often than a teenage boy probably should admit. ‘What about cake? Everybody loves cake. Cakes have layers.’” you said mocking Donkey’s accent. Ellen and I both laughed at you.

I groaned when the oven beeped because it meant we had to part. I was beginning to get really excited for this cake though because the whole house smelled delicious. You leaned forward and patted my leg, signaling you were getting up and I was half tempted to push you back down and lay my head back on your chest.

You climbed up and made your way into the kitchen and I followed, trying to hide the fact that I was pouting like a child who just got their toy taken away. “It needs two more minutes,” you said, re-closing the oven then leaning up against the counter with your arms crossed, looking like some kind of sexy teenage Australian model. “What?” you asked.

It occurred to me then that I was staring at you. “Oh, nothing.” I looked away awkwardly. I feel like that must’ve been a lot like how Thomas felt when he wanted to kiss me but didn’t know if I wanted him to. Sure we’d kissed, especially earlier when you picked me up and we made out. But I wasn’t sure how you’d feel if I just strutted over to you and kissed you right then, especially with how intensely I wanted to.

I wanted to feel your abs, to run my palms across them beneath your shirt. And I wanted to run my tongue along your jawline. Your jawline… So well defined with just a perfect hint of stubble. And I wanted your hands on my ass, or better yet up my shirt- Where were these thoughts even coming from? I’ve never been like this. The most my thoughts went like this was just “Wow he’s hot I’d totally makeout with him.” But when it came to you it was a whole different ordeal.

“You’re staring at me like a hungry lion. And you’re biting your lip,” you said matter-of-factly.

“Sorry.” I turned away, blushing. I FELT like a hungry lion.

The oven beeped again and I noticed your smirk as you pulled it out and turned off the oven. To feel less awkward by just standing there I went and grabbed the frosting. “Dibs on this part.”

“You gonna frost it right now?”

“Sure, why not?”

You were smirking again. “You sure you wanna do it right now?”

“Uh, unless you had something else in mind.” Were you having the same perverted thoughts I was? Because I could totally go for another make out session-

“Well I’m just saying you could frost it right now if you really want to but it’s all gonna melt if you don’t wait for it to cool down.”

Oh.

For some reason everything inside of me seemed to feel like it was shrinking. You really just weren’t having the same thoughts. Here I was thinking you wanted me to wait so you could feel me up but instead you were thinking solely about the cake. I felt pathetic. It also reminded me again of Thomas because that’s how he was. He always wanted to kiss and grope me and I just didn’t. I mean sometimes yeah but not ALL the time. It feels shitty being on the receiving end of that.

“Hey,” you said softer, “It’s okay, I’m only teasing. You just don’t bake often enough to know.” You gave me a light kiss on the cheek and I tried to smile back but I couldn’t manage it considering that wasn’t the reason I was upset. Maybe I was overreacting but when you want someone so badly and they just aren’t meeting you halfway it just makes you feel so isolated.