My Brother's Best Friend

Chapter 12- I Don't Want To Lose You

*Mickey's POV*

          I was just laying in bed, thinking about the events that just happened yesterday. How could I fool myself into thinking that I was actually ready to have sex with Justin. I was being so selfish and totally thoughtless. How could I do such a thing?

       "Sweetheart, are you okay?" I heard Justin mumble in a very husky voice as he lightly shook me.

           I turned around to face him and the back of his hand lightly stroked my cheek as he gave me a look of concern.

         "I-I'm fine." I stuttered, clearly giving the impression that I'm not okay.

        "Sweetheart, that's the biggest lie a girl can tell. You're tossing and turning while you're sleeping. There's obviously something on your mind." He spoke in a low voice, almost like a whisper.

        I love the way how he called me 'sweetheart'. That's my favorite nickname. I just gave him a small grin, but then sighed, remembering what was on my mind.

         "I don't want to talk about it." I say as I get up out of bed and walk downstairs. I go to the refrigerator and pour myself a glass of water. As I gulp it down, I hear footsteps coming down the stairs, as I see Justin approach me.

            "Babygirl, please talk to me." He begged.

          I set my glass of water down as he comes up and wraps his arms around me and pulls me into a hug and I hug back. He's whispering sweet things in my ear, also telling me that everything is going to be okay. As I pull away from the hug, I take a deep breath and look at him in the eyes.

        "Justin, I think it was a bad idea that we had sex, and I'm sorry I kind of forced you into it." I said.

       He gave me an 'I told you so' look.

        "Sweetheart, I tried to tell you that you really weren't ready. Why did you want us to have sex so bad?" He asks.

           I was on the verge of tears when he asked me that. The only way how I'm going to be able to explain this is going to basically make it sound like I was just using him, when truthfully, I really didn't mean to.

          "When I was at the store yesterday, I bumped into Ryan. He and I got into a fight, I told him we were together, and then he said you didn't actually love me, and then I got angry and sad at the thought, but then I remember you asking if I wanted to have sex the other day and well, the rest you know." I explained.

           Justin just gave me a look of sympathy. He came up to me and placed his lips on mine as he wrapped his arms around my waist and I did the same with his neck. We pulled away after about 5 minutes.

        "Baby, I told you, there are other ways we can prove our love for each other." He explained.

       "I know, I was being dumb, and selfish, and stupid, and-" He cut me off.

         "Hush now baby, hush." He gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Why don't you go lay down on the couch and pick out a movie from Netflix while I get us some snacks. How does that sound?"

        "Okay." I whispered.

          I went over to the couch and layed down. I picked out Safe Haven because I really love Nicholas Sparks's stories. They're really good in my opinion. Justin came back with some chips and cookies. I got up and he layed down while he pulled me down on top of him and pulled a very soft, white blanket over us. We watched the movie as we ate chips and sugar cookies and Justin would be holding me very tightly.

        "Hey Justin?" I asked.

      He looked down at me "Yes babygirl?" He replied.

      "Why are you holding onto me so tightly?" I asked.

     "Because I don't want to lose you." He replied.

          Aww, that's so sweet! He doesn't want to lose me. Although, what makes him think he's going to lose me?

     "Why would you lose me?" I asked.

    He just shrugged his shoulders.

        "I guess what I'm trying to say is...I don't want this to end up being a very toxic relationship like when Selena and I were together. All the arguing, the yelling, the cheating, I just can't go through with that a second time." He explained.

     "Cheating? You guys cheated on each other?" I asked.

       He paused the movie, then looked back at me.

       "I know Selena has slept with a lot of guys before me, and actually, the truth is, she wasn't my first. I've also had a fair share of getting girls from the club in my bed." He explained.

     I thought for a moment. How many girls has he slept with besides me?

     "Uh, Justin? How many girls, besides me, have you slept with?" I asked unintentionally.

     "You really want to know?"

      I nodded my head and he sighed.

      "I've slept with twenty four girls."

           I was in shock at this point. Twenty four girls? That makes up almost half the girls in a private college class.

       "Oh." Was all I could say as I layed my head down on his chest.

        "Honey, I know what I did was wrong and I know I was being selfish and immature, but that's why I want a fresh start with a brand new girl. One who is very caring and loves me for me and doesn't just use me because I'm good in bed. You are that kind of girl." He explained.

        I look up at him as he looks into my eyes.

      "Sweetheart, if it makes you feel any better, you are actually the first virgin I've ever slept with, and the best I've ever had. I didn't want to have sex with you just yet because I wanted to make it special, but when you were kissing my neck and massaging Jerry, I could see you really wanted it, and when we were done, I was shaking because I just couldn't believe how amazing it was. You are fantastic in bed, you know that." He explained.

      I blushed as he kissed my cheek and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

       "Thanks. You were really good too. Jerry is really big." I said surprised.

      "I know." He winked.

        I started getting a little turned on by his actions. I think he saw it because he started kissing my neck and I moaned.

        "Does my baby want a round two?" He whispered in my ear as he nibbled on it.

       "Mmmm, mhmm." I moaned.

      "I want you baby, all of you." Justin groaned.

        "I want you too, I don't care about taking things slow, I just want you inside me." I whispered in his ear.

             He then carried me upstairs into our bedroom. He locked the door and we tore off each other's clothes, got on the bed, and made love for god knows how long.

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