He took the midnight train going anywhere

Chapter 3

Merlin used his door as an anchor, he leaned heavily against it trying to calm himself down.

"Merlin, what's wrong?"

Merlin jumped he had been so focused on calming down he hadn't seen his mother come into the hallway. Merlin opened and closed his mouth a few times, he wanted to tell his mother about the calls and texts but she was happy here. Merlin knew that if he told her she would want to take him and run again and he couldn't take her happiness away, so Merlin shrugged trying to fain nonchalance.

"Nothing, I just wanted to get back early so I could get a head start on homework", While his mother would have never believed Will if he used this excuse, she would believe him as Merlin actually enjoyed going to school.

"Ah good, Will is here he said he wanted to talk to you".

Merlin inwardly groaned, he knew that meant Will hadn't forgotten about how he had acted before Glee. "Is he in my room?"

"Yeah, would you like anything maybe milk and cookies?" Hunith said playfully with a grin.

"Mum", Merlin whined as he went upstairs.

Merlin reluctantly went inside, Will swiveled around in Merlin's chair when he heard him come in.

Will crossed his arms, "Talk".

"There's nothing to talk about".

"Come on Merlin, I saw how anxious you were in class".

"I was just worried about the class, Maths is my weak point".

"I know you're keeping something big from me Merlin. You have been for years".

Merlin looked up at Will in shock, "What?"

"Please just tell me what this secret is".

Merlin looked away and squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to keep tears at bay, "I'm sorry I can't. Not this".

"You don't trust me do you?"

Merlin looked back at Will his eyes widened, "Of course I trust you Will".

"Then why won't you tell me?"

"I wish I could, but-"

"No buts Merlin, if you can't tell me I don't think we can be friends anymore".

"Y-you don't mean that", Merlin said unable to keep the tremor out of his voice.

"How can we be friends if you don't trust me? I have been waiting for so long for you to tell me this secret. Every day for years I hoped you would tell me, but you didn't and I can't wait anymore. So either tell me right now, or our friendship is over".

Merlin didn't try to stop the tears running down his face now, knowing it would be useless to try, "I want to tell you so badly, but I... I can't".

"Good bye Merlin", Will said sadly and left the room.

Merlin slid down his door into a tight ball and let everything out, the pain of losing Will, the hurtful calls and messages, his past, the bullies he faced every day, the fact that Arthur would never love him, everything.

The next day was so hard for Merlin, he had tried avoiding Will but given that they had a lot of classes together and their lockers were next to each other this was very difficult. Merlin was getting his things from his locker when Will appeared at his side going throug his own locker.

"Will I-"

"I don't want to hear it Merlin", Will said coldly without looking at him.

"I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid you would hate me", Merlin said.