Under the moonlight

Chapter 22

I stayed around the stream a little bit longer than I had initially planned.
The thought of Kojo and Amare dying was not that comforting.
I also could not believe that Papa knew the extent of danger that they were in but he just chose to withhold the information from us.

I understood that he was also seriously affected by the current situation but I also believed that if he shared with us,  then the burden might be not be as heavy.  After all,  a problem shared, is a problem half solved.
Since I was a little girl, I had always admired how macho Papa is.
He always seemed to possess some inner strength which I could not really decipher.

He loved me more than any other father in the village would his only daughter, but he did not show it openly,  lest he lost his masculinity : He was in a cage, if you asked me.
Besides all this, in a strange and twisted way, I wanted to be like him.
To possess that power and control and still manage to love deeply.

I spent a little more time at the stream just sitting and staring at the sky.
I tried to eat mangoes but they did not taste as sweet as wanted them to be and that said something because all my life I had never turned down a mango.

I gazed at the sky and even though it was not yet entirely dark,  I still managed to see stars.
Kojo and I used to gaze at the sky and tell ourselves that our love was as forever as the stars.
I wondered what he was doing at that time. Probably nursing a wounded brother or perhaps he was the wounded one.

The thought of Kojo being wounded gave me another fit of sobs.  I just could not handle the fact that he could die out there.
Nothing had ever made me this weak and I definitely did not like how weakness felt like.

I was so lost in my thoughts about Kojo that I did not notice how much time had gone by.
It was dark and I was still there.
Very dangerous.
My clothes had also dried up.

I started going back home and it was like I was in a trance.
Suddenly I could not tell what was going on around me.
I was just walking : existing.

Getting home,  I decided to sneak right back into my room.  I could not bear to face Papa after hearing him confess his fears.  He was scared for me,  for us and I had made it even worse by sneaking out.

I tried to tiptoe stealthily into the room but just as I got in, I met Papa waiting for me at the door.

"Young girl, where do you think you are going ? "

Now, I was definitely going to die. This time, for real.

"Papa I am sorry. I did not mean to... "

"Of course you did not mean to. We all do not. "

Now, I was sure as hell I was going to get killed. Papa was acting so calm that it scared me to the bones.
Why couldn't he just scold at once and get over and done with it. And where was Mama when I needed her,  although I was not really counting on her.

"Knowing you, I know that you're wondering where your mother is to defend you right now, but she is already asleep, on my orders.
I want to talk to you. "

Another talk?  I was really hoping that it would not be about marriage again because I was not in the right state of mind to think about husbands and wedding songs.

"I know that you were the one at the stream and that you overheard my conversation with my fellow elder. "

"You knew? "

"Of course I knew.  No one has a hard time hiding their tears and sobs like you do.  You get that from your mother, by the way. "

That was suddenly calming because, Papa had seen me at the stream and he still managed to joke around about it.

"I know that you are having a hard time going on with life because your brother is out there and..."

"And my b... "

"And your what, Dembe?

"And my friends Papa. My friends. "

I was going to mess it up already. Papa did not know about Kojo just yet and I was about to spill a whole basket of beans just like that.
Looking at him,  I could tell that he was not convinced.

"As I was saying, it is hard for all of us. And I would like you to hold on a little while longer and be strong for me and your mother as we wait for your brother and the rest of the young men to come back home.
You are strong, my child. I have always known that.
And you can always come to me whenever you feel low, running off will not help you know, because you still came back. "

As I sat across from Papa and listened to Papa talk,  it dawned on me just how lucky I was.
I had two loving parents, a not-so-smart brother, an annoying boyfriend and a very crazy best friend.
What more could a girl ask for?

All I was left to do was just pray and hope that Kojo and Amare will come back home in one piece.

******

Hello,

I  am so sorry for being inconsistent with my updates.

I have no valid excuse (School work can count, though. 😉) , but I promise to update more. This time for sure.

This is quite a short chapter, but I hope you love it.

Thank you for reading!

Love,
Daisy. 💋