Reader One-Shots {Anime}

Castlevania: Trevor Belmont {"Would You Please Leave My Testicles Alone?"}

☆WRITTEN MARCH, 2018☆

{*** indicates a time skip.}

"Then I sees me sheep, fucked within an inch of his life, and guess what I did?"

You started to lean over, slurping your drink, before replying, but another man beat you to it. He knocked back the rest of his. "You hit him with yer shovel?"

"Yer damn right I him with me shovel." The bartender rolled his eyes as the men kept conversing. You raised your head, your cloak obstructing your face and most of what'd make you stick out in that tavern, and peered disappointedly down into your cup. You swallowed the rest of the amber lager and hit the surface of the bar with the underside of the wooden mug.

"Hey...heyyyyyyyyy, barkeep." The grimy owner of the fine establishment briefly stopped scrubbing his hopeless counters to take your order. "Give me some more of this piss you call ale." Your voice came out a little too high, and while the men around you noticed, they had already turned their attention elsewhere when another man stood up. You didn't see him as you grinned, raising the bubbling drink eagerly to your lips. If those horrifying creatures were coming, you were going to get fuckin' obliterated before they could make their way to over here to kill you. Plastered. Wasted. You wouldn't even notice them, let alone how afraid you were. You were getting there.

You swallowed almost half of your next round of beer before you turned to see the same man stalking moodily away. Wow. Someone's cranky. Must be a harrowing hangover. You blinked in stupor, one eye at a time, and though your vision was clouded, you knew why they were fighting. They'd called him by his surname. Belmont. You knew it, who his family had been. If you weren't so close to being totally drunk, and the alcohol hadn't made literally everything more appealing, you'd have noticed that he was definitely more attractive than the other Belmonts you'd encountered. He was, even objectively, pretty goddamn handsome.

He did look unkempt, though. The other patrons around you were angry with him, and they had drawn the bartender into their assault, and as men did, they went straight for below the belt tactics. This was a bar-fight. No class needed. It was unfair, however. You wanted to get involved but opted to stay out of it, lest they discover you weren't like them at all. You were glad you weren't. It looked like it hurt. The prettier man winced, falling to his knees and you almost fell off your chair.

"Would you please leave my testicles alone?" He grunted. This time you did fall. The men heard you.

"Oi! You there- why don't you come help us? You can't care 'bout him can ya? He's a Belmont! Come on, boy, join us!"

You'd landed upside down but got to your feet as deftly as an inebriated young woman could. You gulped, trying to lower your voice. "Uh...I don't really want to. It's not my place. I just wanted-"

"Hey wait a minute..." the fatter man interrupted you. "What's yer name?"

You pulled down your hood, using the first name you could think of. "Trevor." The man they'd ganged up on looked at you, like you'd called him instead.

"Oh yeah? You sure?" They started to leave him, to walk towards you now, allowing the other man to get back to his feet. "I don't think you are a boy, are ya?"

"I'm a boy!" You cleared your throat. "A- a man! I have uh, testicles too, and I love beer and uh, hunting stags and uh, uhhhhhhh uhh uh boobs? Yeah! Boobs. Breasts. Cant get enough of those. And I hate taking showers and I love eating meat and smoking and drinking and uhhhh" they cut you off again.

"Yer obviously not a man, but yer right about us liking breasts. Take off the cloak."

"Hey, Trevor." The man from before came to your rescue, and before anyone could do much else you were outside the building as your assailants were knocked out on the floor.