Days, weeks, months.
Everyday is a new era,
And yet I find you to maintain, And manage, -stability - throughout it all.
I don't know anything about you, however slowly you find yourself involved with me.
How did you manage? I was a trap, and you just barely escaped the edges.
I have a general description;
your name provides happiness,
and your values are pure.
Despite your innocence,
I can't bring myself to look you in the eye.
-I can not recognize you from memory, although I know you can recognize me.
The effort is there. I promise I'll stay loyal.
I can't look at you because if I'm caught, you'll then begin to realize,
Behind my eyelids lay a hollow heart wrapped in great.
I Avoid eye contact.
In fear your vivid glaze.
Even the slightest form of visibility could pierce right through the glass wall I have built.
A wall of shame, anger, erosion and madness:
To filter the intensity of living with this idea of damaged goods;
and you'll see;
I am nothing but pure chaos.
At the very least,
A magnet to another realm of reality.
I can not put your face to your name.
Unwanted and invaluable Refusal,
It stands strong
This idea, it began with hesitation however,
It blossoms swiftly and more rash by the second.
There is no physical replication.
An old soul trapped in the lost.
I don't want to feed off your positivity and become blind by loss of structure.
This is not a feeling of Familiarity.
Quite far from it, complex and vibrant, this thought of doubt,
Not in you but the system.
The exact moment
I allow you to look into my eyes and shatter the transparent thin glass layer one by one.
I become vulnerable yet again.
I can only handle it from a distance during a short period of time.
I would love to embrace a change.
A form of impact.
However there is one idea unsolvable,
If your to close would I become too rash and loose sight of who I was and strives to be in the very beginning.
