Danger Days: The True Lives of The Shit-Faced Bastards

Old Friends Reunite

April 4, 2019

( 7 Years Later....... )

~Detonation Punx POV~

 Yeah! Were ddddrrriiivvvviiiinnnngggg! In the desert! OH YEAH! And were going to kill some Dracs! HAH YEAH!! And --spark-- And....what the fuck was that spark!? ARE YOU BREAKING DOWN ON ME BIKESIE!? Hahah jo your a good bikesi--spark-- Fuck... NO! URGH! NO BIKE NO! YOUR NOT GOING TO TWITCH OUT ON ME! NO! SATY IN LINE!! *sprak* Okay just relax Abby....just drive how you normally do..... *sigh* Swirve Right, Swirve Left, Drive straight. THEN REPEAT THE FUCKIGN PROCESS! YES!! OH YE---HOLY FUCK A CAR!! AAAAHHHH!! --crash--

Heh. You probably want to know what the spontaneous outburst was about don't you? Well....YOUR NOSEY!! BAHAAHAHAHHA--cough cough-- Okay well Today is Friday. Why the fuck does that matter? Well Friday is my ....'grocery shopping' day as you can call it where I am seemingly forced to get off my lazy ass, break into Batery City, and steal some food and shit so I can survive. It's actually a pretty fun expierance but today my STUPID BUTT FUCKING PIECE OF CRAP motercycle decided to break down and spazz out in the middle of the road which cause me to crash nto an oncomming car and get thrown off of my bike only to land quite painfully on my ass. DAMN FUCK BIKE FUCK DAMN ASS DAMN--"WHAT THE SHIT!? UGH!! MY CAR!! THE FUCK BRO! CAN'T YOU WATCH WHIEL YOUR GOING!?" I was taken far from aback by this bitches rudeness, which just made me fucking up her car a bigger victory than it already was. Yeah I'm fucking fine thanks for asking! ".....Sorry.....I'm just stressed beyinf hell because Dracs kinda sorta took over my base and I've been on the run from them for the past hour." Huh.....well sorry about your car. "Sorry about your ass! >:)" THABK YOU! :D MR. SPLEANDED FEELS SO MUCH MORE BETTER NOW! I then 'oh so gracefully' stood up only to find a cramp in my thigh and I topled over. TOH SHIT! BLAKKK! "BAHAHA ARE YOU OKA--W-Wait a minute.....do that noise again.." Hahha what my mutation!? :D BLAKK!! This chicks eyes suddnly grew the size of rapist balls and she started stuttering like a 10 year old at a Speling Bea. "tzyvghbx!! gahfghk!! A-Abby?" o_o How the BUTTS do you knwo my name!? DID THE DOG SEND YOU!? o_O "ABBY!!! :D OH MY FUCKING GAWD! Dude!! It's me!! Alyissa! :D" o_o A-Alyissa? -nod- BAHAHA DUDE THIS FEELS LIEK A ROMANCE MOVIE! :'D "Awe hell yeah! Lets go ride off on my disembodies car into the sunset together!" Halalala!! Okay Baby! ;D *wink wink* *sigh* "Yupp.....still the creepy Abby I remember! :)" Hhaha DUDE! Where has your nigger ass been!? "Hur...well after all the shit went down, I ran away, found an abondoned shopping mall, renamed myself Jailbreak Riot and continued on from there." Jailbreak Riot eh? I'm Detination Punx! :D "YOUR MOMMA'S A PUNX!" Don't chu talk about my momma liek that! GURL I WILL CUT CHU! "HAH! BRING IT BIZATCH! >:D" *creeper smirk* I'll have you know Miss. Riot...I am speacailized in the art of knife throwing. I bring a whole new meaning to the "I will cut you" threat. "Yeah well I collect broken bottls and stab the shit out of people! BRING IT PUNK! >:D" PUNX not PUNK! >:D We both just stood there for a while with these rediciously imtimmidating faces busted on before blinking a couple times and doubling ver in laughter. Awe....just liek the good old times! :'D "Hahha oh man you have NO idea how much I missed you! :)" Hahah I missed you too! But are we just going to stand here or can we go miss each other indoors!? "Sure, do you have a base?" Erh....no not exactly...I mostly spend my life roaming around from zone to zone killing Dracs, stealing food, and shit. OH THAT REMINDS ME! I WAS on my way to Batery City to steal food before you so RUDELY inturupted me! ;D "Pfft! Nigga don't get me started on hwo bad ou fucked up my--" BAHA Alright , alright! I get it! now stop your nagging so we can figure out where to go! "Lets just drive around for a while until we find a place legit enough to house our asses!" Yeah alright.....it shouldn't be THAT hard!

4 Hours Later................

~Welcome To Zone 5~

"Zone 5!? Da Fuck!? How many zones are in this god forsaken pla--" THERE!! *glares at Abby*  "AS I was saying I--" THERE!! "GODDAMMIT STOP INTURUPTING ME!" THERE!!"NO!" UGH OKAY, HOW ABOUT THERE!? "Abby that's a fucking ROCK! We can't live in a rock! ._." .......maybe YOU can't *pout* *chortle* "Abby you are more than welcome to get your fat ass out of my car and live on that rock all by yourself at 3 am! ;D" ........You Whore! ._. "MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Seriously though, what was wrong with the fifty gas stations we passed up?!? "There too close to Batery City. If we stayed there, in less than 2 hours time, we would be surrounded by Dracs and shit." URRGH!!! FFFFFIIIIIINNNNNNNEEEEE!! *le smirk of triumph* "Yeah because if we were to--" HOW ABOUT THAT GAS STATION!? :D I pointed my finger under Alyissa's nose causing her to mumble 'fucking whore' under her breath and then switch her gaze over to the old run down Valero Gas Station with lights and extra pillars and stuff and ....urh.....I FOUND THIS SHIT!! WOLOLOLOL! ACCOMPLISHMENT! XD ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL! :D "Actually.......it's a piece of shit!" PFFT!! YEAH!? Well this 'piece of shit' has electricity, running water, a toilet, and a roof so if you can come up with a better option.....DO Tell! ;D ".....Touche! ^_^ *sigh* Fine! We'll stay in your shit station but were at LEAST going to use the pillows, blankets,and meat cans in my tunk! ;D" YEAH!! :D I'M GOUNG TO NAME IT HELGA! :D *chuckle* "Hahha whatever Abby, just go enter Helga and be happy! ;D"Okay I wil--Hey wait a minut-- "BAHAHA YOUR GOING TO ENTER HELGA! BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! XD"  NYEHH!! D: "OFLOFLOF!! XD" YOU SHUT YOUR FACE!! D:< "MWHAHAHA--Okay." AND ANOTHER THING--wait did you just say okay!? o_o ".........." ................ "ABAHAHA I SHOCKED YOU! ~SCORE~ Tehe but seriosuly.....help me get the shit out of my car so we can go SLEEP UH!" Well Okay I-- "OH YEAH! *smirks* Your fixing my fucking car tomorrow!" WHAT!? Oh Come On!! It's only a TINY scratch and mayeb a dent or two....mumble mumble.... "Well good! I guess it won't take you that long now will it? ;D" ._. Alyissa.....you DO realize that I am the supreme commander of lazyness and I rarely get off my ass to go to the bathroom let alone fix a fucking car! AND BESIDES! I have to fix my poor motercycle! He's been injured 8-) "Yeah well my car's WAY more important than your motorcycle and unless you want to wakeup chained butt naked to a cactus then I suggest you fix that car!" Your so fucking sassy! -_- *waves hand in air* "Yeah yeah whatever just fix my car!" And with that, my best friend walked inside leaving ME to carry in all the blankets and shit. *huff* Well SOMEBODY is getting a shit in their pilow case! >:) *evil cackling* 

(A/N: WOLOLOLOLOL!! I HAVE DECIDED TO BLESS YOU WITH LYN-Z FUCKIN WAY! :D -ahem- But besides that, you see that picture? Yeah well Abby drew that picture of Detination and Jailbreak.....it's not colored and you can't make it out very well but nyehh......Detination's on the top and Jailbreak is on the bottom. OOHOHOOHOHHO ;D But yeah.....please tell me how crappy this story is in every detail your mind can think of and hav a wonderful day! :D)