The Hamilton Charm

Chapter 23

I sat in shock and gazed at the hopeful Cassio who was bent on one knee. I probably looked quite comical right now with my mouth hanging open. I was most likely pale in the face as well. I really wasn’t expecting this...this proposal from Cassio. As he stated earlier, we didn’t know each other that well or for very long.

“Talia I know that this might come as a shock but I knew pretty much from the moment we met that you were perfect for me. I know I don’t deserve you but...” I grimaced at that, I was the one that didn’t deserve him. I can admit it to myself now that I have been a complete and utter bitch to him. I only cared about myself and not his feelings. Sometimes my selfishness scared me; I thought that I was completely different from my father. But I guess that’s not true, I only do what benefits me, just like him. I don’t want to be like that.

“But I love you and if you will allow me, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to buy a house, have children, retire and raise grandchildren and I want to experience that all with you Talia. I hope you do to” he continued while retaining eye contact with me.

I could feel that my eyes were beginning to water. I blinked away the tears but one or two slipped down my cheek. Cassio reached forward and wiped one tear before it fell from my face. A smile was etched onto his face as if this was the happiest day of his life. How could I, who has been horrible to him, make this man so happy? If only he knew what I had done. It would devastate him but I don’t think I could lie to him for my entire life.

He was what I needed; I’ve never felt love properly, well not from my parents at the very least. I craved the chance to be loved and cherished. I needed Cassio he provided stability in my life.

I too wanted everything Cassio did from this marriage, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted it from Cassio. I was going to break up with him tonight for god’s sake! I think I only realised until he bent down on one knee how much he meant to me. I was so deluded that I couldn’t see perfection before my eyes. I tried to run the one good thing in my life for someone just as fucked up as me. We have been living together for the last few weeks and there would just be an empty void in my life if he wasn’t there to fill it. Although he doesn’t compare to Iver in looks or in bed he could give me the one thing Iver couldn’t; love.

“So what do you say?” he asked, hope lacing his tone of voice.

“...yes!” I smiled hesitantly and leaned forward to kiss the surprise from his face. I didn’t want him to question me. He grinned against my lips and pulled me closer. The restaurant erupted into applause. I moved away from Cassio and thanked them. A couple of people passed and congratulated us on our engagement.

Cassio grabbed my attention again by stroking my cheek. “I love you Talia”.

“I...love you too” I proclaimed, I wasn’t sure if I really meant it though. I reached forward to hug him, my arms looped around his neck and I hid my face in his shoulder. I just hoped that I made the right choice.

The restaurant gave us the dinner on the house and we returned back to mine where Cassio as cringy as it sounds...made love to me. It was passionate and sweet, not hot and heavy like it was with me and Iver. He took his time, it was nice but I couldn’t help but feel a hint of disappointment that it wasn’t Iver above me. I was still conflicted with my choice but I knew I had to do what was right for me. An emotionally detached man could not be good for me.

The next day I went over to Callie’s for lunch. Her apartment was massive with four full sized bedrooms and three bathrooms. I don’t know why they needed it all if I’m honest; they slept in the same bedroom together. She had a lovely kitchen with an island and lots of cabinets and a gorgeous sitting room decked out with a Plasma screen TV. The apartment was mostly designed with pastel colours and lots of white. I looked around with wonder; I hadn’t been in her new apartment which she bought with Pierre. He was heading out for the day when I arrived so I only managed a quick ‘hello’.  He was a tall guy, around six foot and quite stylish. He was dressed in a three piece tweed suit with brown leather elbow pads. He was a very good-looking specimen. I mentally applauded Callie on her choice of fiancé.