Release

Trust

Today, she feels extra sad. She doesn't know why it bothers her so much now, but she realised today that she hated the no touching opposite gender rule.

She is the person who doesn't have many friends. So when she got one or two good friends, she would invest her time and effort in them and she loves physical touch to show that she cares for them. But now that she can't do that, she feels very upset.

At first, it didn't bother her, because she knew no one and had no need to touch guys. But now ... She wants it more and more each day.

She has many feelings bottled up inside of her. Anger for the rules. Anger for her ex-best friend who keeps telling her how she uses people and makes her feel bad. Want for one boy she wants to get to know better. Irritation for you don't know who to trust. Irritation and disgust for those bitches. Tired for all the bullshit happening. Love for her new best friend. Sad for she misses her good girl friend from high school; her special friend; and another good guy friend.

She should actually tell someone. But who? Her parents? She would never. They wouldn't understand. Her best friend? I guess. But still, it begs the question: Will she understand? Will any of her good / best friends understand?

This is why she tells no one. She doesn't trust. She doesn't believe they will understand. What if they laugh at her? What will she do then? For this is a serious matter ...

This is what she feels. She hopes that she can get past all of this and just feel ... FREE !

She just wants a clean slate. She also wants a guy friend she can trust and tell things to. Someone she can ask for anything.

Until she finds him, she will be carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders ...