My Weakness

Here I Am

London's P.O.V

As I look out the window of the cab, I couldn't help, but feel defeated. I'm in a cab with a nigga that I had mixed emotions about: I wanted to hate him for everything, but, at the same time, I wanted to climb on top of him, kiss him, and tell him all about the dreams I've had about us getting married, having kids, and growing old together.

I could feel his eyes on me every other minute. Every time I look at him, he turns around and looks out the window. We've been in the car for what seems like forever. I guess he read my mind because he broke the silence with:

Chad: We're almost there.

I kept my silent rant afloat because I had nothing to say to him. I was only going with him because I didn't want him in my apartment and I knew he wasn't going to leave until I gave in, but where he messed up is that he's getting me my own room. As soon as he leaves me alone, I'm going to be out of there and back to the life I had here before he came barging in on my life. I smiled at the plan I just hatched up because he has no idea.

With what seemed like 45 mins to an hour later, we had pulled up to an office building. He paid the cab driver and we got out the car. I saw his Red 2016 Dodge Ram 1500 in the parking lot.

Chad: You should get in the truck; I'll be out in a few.

I still didn't say anything to him. I just went to the passenger side of the truck and waited on him to unlock the door. He looked at me as if he was waiting for me to say something, but I didn't have anything to say to him; I just wanted to get away from him and jump on him all at the same time. Damn; either I needed some dxck or I needed to fight to get this frustration out of me.

Chad: Are you not going to say anything to me?

Me:.....

I just kept silent; I wouldn't know what to say if I wanted to say something anyway.

Chad: (breathes deeply) you know what!? Fine... do whatever you wanna do.

Me: What I wanna do is not be here with you, but you made that pretty impossible, huh?

He just walked away from me as if I was irritating him. The last I remembered he wasn't the one being held hostage. I told him I didn't wanna be near him, but he took it upon himself to drag me along. I swear when he does shxt like that it makes me not miss him at all.

He finally unlocks the door before walking into the building and I go ahead and get inside, throw my bag in the backseat, and put on my seatbelt. I hope he hurried up because it's getting dark and no one wants to be on the east side of Detroit when it gets dark.

About 15 mins later he, finally, comes out of the building and gets into the truck. I had nodded off, but was soon awaken when he shut the truck door. He cranked up the truck and drove out of the parking lot. He looked at me as if he was waiting on me to say something.

Chad: Aren't you forgetting something?

He's referring to me reminding him to put his seatbelt on. Yea, I noticed; somethings never change. I always got on Chad about putting on his seatbelt whenever we got into the car. He always would say, "Bae I'm a tall asx nxgga & seatbelts make me look like I'm short" right before he put his seatbelt.

Me: What!?

I act like I have no idea what he's talking about because, in all honesty, I want him to think that I've stop caring for him. He looks at me with hurt in his eyes, but puts his seatbelt on.

Chad: Nothing man.

I brace myself for the ride ahead of me when he gets on the interstate on the way to God knows where. I just lay back and look out the window as if I've never seen the scenery before.