It's been 10 years since we left Ohio. We have established a life here, in California with my grandma. It's funny because 10 years sounds like a long time to most people, but a cut so deep takes much longer to heal.
However I've learned to not dwell on what happened, which was hard, as most nights I was reminded of those events in my nightmares.
James is taking classes at a community college nearby, and I was also taking classes at our local high school as a junior. Luckily for my father, the bank he worked at had a branch in California, so he transferred over.
I sit at my desk finishing up weekend homework on a Sunday night. I lean back in my chair and run my fingers through my long, light brown hair when my eyes caught sight of my grandma in the doorway.
"Dinners ready, Andi," she says in her soft voice.
"Ok, thanks, grandma," I say looking back down at the work I still had left to do.
"She was true beauty." She continues, speaking in a dream like state. I look up at her to see her staring at the picture of my mother I kept in my room. It was the last family photo we took together.
"Yeah, she was." I smile, looking at her dark blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes.
"She had your name all picked out, you know. I remember she called my when she found out that her and Dan were having a girl. She was so excited because she always wanted a girl and have her name be Andria."
"I know, Dad told me. And then she got mad at him because he kept calling me Andi." I finish the story for her.
"Yeah." My grandma sighs. "But Andi suits you just as well as Andria does. Now come and eat before your dinner gets cold."
I follow her into the kitchen to see my dad and James already eating. My grandma and I sit down and start eating as well.
"Oh, Andi, I was just telling James that I probably won't be home until late tomorrow." My Dad informs me. "I have a late business meeting."
"Again?" I ask him forking my chicken.
"Yeah, the branch is making major changes to the system." He answers.
I look over at James to see him sullen and silent. He was scooping his food to the center of the plate, and playing around with it.
"What time are you going to be home, James?" I ask him.
"Depends on tests I have the next day." He answers quietly. "But I'll probably go to the library with Autumn."
Autumn was his girlfriend of three years. She was nice and the perfect fit for James.
From that point on we ate in silence. After dinner I go back to my room to finish up homework when James walks in.
"What do you want?" I ask him looking down at my paper.
"Have you ever wondered what would happen if Dad started dating again?" He asks immediately while he sat on my bed.
I put my pencil down and turn around to look at him. "No, because he wouldn't." I even hear the uncertainty in my voice. "I mean...what about Mom?"
"It's been 10 years, Andi. He's got to move on at some point." He said softly. The thing was, was that I hated when he spoke like that. He reminded me too much of my mother. James had her sparkling blue eyes, and soft facial features.
"Whatever, I have to finish this by tomorrow," I say after a pause, indicating that I want him out.
I blocked out what James had brought up to me, however I couldn't focus after he left my room. I couldn't help but think what would happen if Dad started dating.
I lay in my bed until I drift off to sleep, praying for a dreamless night.
