Fall for You

Murder (4)

"You're not the only one

Walking 'round with a loaded gun"

-Cady Groves, This Little Girl (Murder)

"Toby," Jenny called from the kitchen. "Call Tegan and tell her we're meeting soon."

"Make Josh do it." I called back, my blankets wrapped around me in the way that provides the most comfort - completely and totally burrito style, only my face left unwrapped. The headache was coming on. I could feel it. Waves of quick, sharp pain throbbed in my skull, then disappeared in the next second, but I knew that soon enough it wouldn't fade, and I'd resort to throwing up and making Jenny take care of me.

My sister walked into the room, holding a wooden spoon dripping with chocolate. She licked it delicately. "Are you ok?"

I blinked at her, and Jenny gave a small smile as she stepped towards me, kneeling down slightly to press the back of her hand to my forehead. "Just the headache?" she asked. I nodded minutely, and she brushed my hair back. "Do you want Pablo?"

I frowned at her. "I'm not a little kid anymore, Jenny." I told her, and she gave me a fond smile as she offered me the spoon. I licked it once to please her, and then she took it back. "You used to always cuddle with him no matter what."

I would have replied, but the throbbing pain that shot through my skull was effective at keeping me quiet. My eyes screwed closed, teeth digging into my bottom lip until the metallic taste of blood appeared in my mouth as the sharp pain throbbed at my temples, wrapping coils around my head and squeezing tightly. Jenny's voice sounded far away and muffled as she spoke through the sound of my own heart beating in my ears. "I'll get you aspirin."

She disappeared, and I pressed my hands over my ears painfully, the familiar wrenching in my stomach approaching fast. Jenny reappeared at my side a moment later, tapping my shoulder to make me open my eyes, with a glass of water, a trash can, and a small bowl full of pills. I shook my head as best I could, and she frowned as she walked to the windows, drawing the curtains and dimming the lights soon after until we were in almost complete darkness.

Slowly, the pain receded. I still felt, as I always did, that I had been hit by a truck, but as Jenny held the glass to my lips so I wouldn't have to unbundle myself from the blankets, I was able to take a small sip as she held up a pill and popped it in my mouth.

There were a total of twelve that I took, a few daily and a few only when I got the headaches. The tiny white ones, a blue and yellow one, red, a few orange, a black - I practically swallowed a rainbow every time my head hurt.

I didn't realize Jenny had left my side until she returned, holding a small bear in her arms. I squinted, though I knew exactly who it was and where he was from. Pablo, the bear that my mother had given him as a toy when he was born, his favourite. Light blue, a dark patch on his left side, and one ear practically torn off, he was ugly, but he was my good luck charm.

Jenny tucked him in at my neck, and in a childish gesture, I rubbed my cheek against his soft fur and closed my eyes. Jenny gave a soft laugh. "Go to sleep, Tobes," she murmured. I nestled my face into Pablo's side and closed my eyes, the heaviness that the black pill installed already taking over me.

~*~

"Who wants to explain why an eighteen year old is sleeping with a teddy bear?"

"Quiet!" someone, probably Jenny, hissed. "He's sleeping!"

"With a bear. A blue teddy bear?"

"Don't hate on Pablo," Josh protested quietly. "He's cool."

"Both of you, shut up!"