Now that I've finished taking this all in, I've decided that Anne is right. We need to get out of here.
My second thoughts occur once I look around again. My guilt is still growing. no, I think. I caused this mess, I need to stay and fix it. Besides, all of Zarta is probably doomed, and maybe even every citizen of Priston and Danovak. Throwing that all in, Anne and I wouldn't likely survive anyway even if we were to escape.
And that reminds me, my suicidal thoughts are probably inadequate considering I'll die anyway. But the same question pops up in my head again: what if I begin to cause even more trouble?
No. The best conclusion is to live. Besides, Anne would never forgive me if I left her. Most of all, I need to be strong. And I have to do whatever I can to keep the right people alive. I'd rather die a hero than die a burden who escaped their own faults and left them for the world to handle.
We stand side by side in the crowded Lot as we await to hear any news. A bolt of lightning trails through the fogy sky. "What do you suppose is going to happen to us?" Anne finally lets out.
The start of our conversation is cut off by Mother Maria who begins to smash the same two frying pans together that she had earlier this morning up on mounted deck holding the whipping post. All 10,000 child soldiers stare up at Master Tevov, who has pulled a microphone up to his face. He taps it to make sure it is working, causing it to send a high pitch whistle across the lot. I stare out across the acres of land used for growing crops out in the east, thinking about the lives people are living beyond this country. I have left slavery grounds a few times, but only to do off-site work. Scratch that, I have escaped to the lake about a dozen times in the past month.
"Soldiers," Master Tevov begins. He looks about through the crowd of children and teens. "You have a simple task: stay alive, and keep Zartans alive."
Whispers travel about the crowd. An older boy, about sixteen or seventeen, shouts out from the front of the crowd. "What in the hell happened last night to make this whole place turn upside-down?" he asks. Master Tevov sends a treacherous look back down at him before responding.
"You and Zartan men, ages nineteen to thirty five, are being taken in as soldiers for the first World War..." he begins.
More cries are let out in the crowd. I can recognize a younger boy named Krol sitting on his cousin's shoulders. He's a fearless kid. "Why would you take away me and my dad from my mom and little sister?" he screams out. Another girl about my age tries to calm down a little girl who is breaking down in tears. "Yeah!" she yells out. "Why would you put a six-year-old into combat? What are they gonna do for this failing country, anyways? What are any of us gonna do for this failing country?"
Master Tevov silently waits up on the deck, about the same distance from the ground that the balcony had been from us in the bunk room. I look at Anne, who also tries to hold in tears. She attempts to smile when we make eye contact, but I know she's dying on the inside. "Anne..." I begin. "Its gonna be okay." She nods her head, and wipes her straight blond hair away from her face. I reach over to give her a hug. We may be the same age, but she is considerably taller than me. I think about losing my best friend, the only person I have left since Darrel and Rovella are gone. What would they have thought of all this? What would they have told me?
I stand here, thinking about the number of regrets I've had in the past twenty four hours. Not even A day has gone by since I was trying to hold back tears at the lake while Darrel told me to quit slacking off. I'd do anything to rewrite all of these regrets. I always knew things has to change, but not this much.
Master Tevov clears his throat. "Complaining won't help, you cowards." he declares. Another boy about the same age as me, or maybe a year older, yells out "Why are you calling us names that describe yourself?"
The crowd of children and teens somehow fills with laughter, and a few "oohs." Anne and I actually manage to laugh, too. It may be a simple question, but the funny part about it is how true his point is.
I have nothing to live for, so why not back him up. "Yeah!" I yell out. Anne looks at me, wide eyed with fear. "You haven't been afraid to tell every slave here what to from dawn to dusk since they've been kidnapped, yet you're too afraid to even tell us about the World War that's been going on for three years already!"
The crowd stops laughing and several teens yell "Ohhh!" in shock. Master Tevov shoots me a terrifying look, followed up by Anne. "How did you find out about that?" she asks. I look at her with a smirk. "Rovella told me before she left. She heard Master Tevov and Master Hackle talk about it in the hallway from the bunk room to the kitchen during the night three years ago." I respond. I always knew this war was occurring, I just thought we would continue being absolutely no part of it. There are men already out there, and unfortunately, they're probably struggling to live like the rest of us will.
And that's when I realize that I've done it again. I've shown every slave mercy, and shown every person of Zartan government -Including King Richard and every Master and Mother- that they've messed up this country for themselves.
That's probably why I thought I'd be better off dead earlier, I only bring more tension to this world...
One unknown truth at a time.
