'Suck my Wiggly Dick!' - Hieronymus the Liar in the Edranari Empire

6th Firewane (Week 3) - Samuel

S P I D E R S

These spiders are made out of human blood! I discovered this when I killed one. Sleaz tried to hypnotise the spiders but it didn't really work, so our only option was to fight. When the Fearlings look a you, you get this tremendously dark, mauve feeling of dread and fright... deepest horrors flash before your eyes. However, although I saw a few flickers, it was not nearly enough to fend me off! I was having a great time, spilling blood and gaining little phials of blood from this process. Unfortunately, the cultists disappear, but we do manage to kill all the spiders. Sleaz ties one up as evidence.

A woman turns up – she is a Human Sorceress. She is rather attractive and introduces herself as Isolde. Apparently she was raised by wolves, she seems very laid back.

We have a rest in The Wandering Dolphin. I treat myself to a pretty nice meal because I'm worth it. I consume rather ravenously, though try not to be too rude in front of Sleaz and Kenneth – it might be fine to eat like a boar on one's own, but not when one is with company.

Sleaz reveals he wants to have another identity because currently 'Sleaz' has a criminal record in the Empire. I think this sounds like tremendous fun and help him out not only creating forged documents under the name of Nic Eguy, but I also help him with his appearance. He ends up with hair dyed with a blue streak in it, very hip these days I hear. I do admire the way Slea-- Nic prefers to run from the law instead of deal with it. Dealing is no fun at all. Running, at least you get some exercise.

We go to the parliamentary building and have a quarrel about something stupid. I go in with Xanaphia and Isolde in the end, leaving Kenneth outside with... Nic. Isolde and I do our best to charm information out of these guys for the question of the layout of the city and its under-street architecture (fancy way of saying – ugh – sewers) as we will need to venture below the city to continue our mission of the Dark Prince and its cult. The best place to go is the Architectural Office. All maps should be there.

We get an appointment via a Sending stone. Very cool. We spot plans for a city being built in a gorge along the South coast bearing the Arken seal.

We get the maps for the West of the serets, as this is where we will have to go. There are rumours of a monster right in the place we will be going to – of course there is a monster... sigh – and a fire burned down the serets. My God, the serets aren't the luckiest areas are they? The spider symbol is common there, and the man speaking to us about the serets doesn't like us mentioning Fearlings when we do. He does not seem happy at all, in fact, when we do. Nevertheless, we press on. He gives us records of who's taken out maps so we can pursue the chase.

I met a lovely elf called Samuel who works in his step-father's blacksmith shop. Kenneth was very hostile indeed against the poor fop, who explained his parentage is mostly elf or half-elf, and his mother simply remarried a Dwarf, hence why he works in the blacksmith's. I am rather attracted to Samuel, he has a very effeminate vibe to him.

We set off for the serets. Isolde is already there and informs us of where we must go. We have some debate about going down there... well, I debate. I don't want to get my suit or person dirty. I really do not. But in the end we go, and I follow, grimacing and hating all the way.

Just as I fear, something awful happens. We run into a slime beast – it is as if the entire sewer valley (fancy way of saying raw, untreated, floating, gassy sewage) is alive. And it is. Technically it is. We fight with it, me managing to set off a Hellish Rebuke on it – it felt amazing to just let loose my Infernal cursing tongue onto it... I am a foul-mouthed little cunt, I really am. But, horrifyingly, Ivellios gets dragged into the sewer by the thing. Xanaphia keeps trying to kill it, I do try and help Ivellios out but I fail since there is no way I am risking him pulling me down there. I think I'd die of... just general hatred of life at that point. I am miserable down here, I needn't be suicidal too. I would hate my suit to get ruined any more than it has, also my hair. Ugh. Awful.