We're Not Too Far Gone (Rick Grimes)

Chapter 26

Running. I was running. Kara in my arms and Rick by my side. Where were the others? Where was I? How did we get here? I dont know.

I looked behind to see hundreds of walkers, sprinting. Sprinting. 

I heard a thump next to me and a scream. I saw Rick slowly being eaten. I tried to scream, but no sound came out.

I carried on running with tears streaming down my face. Kara in my arms tighter than ever.

Then i fell.

I felt Kara get squashed underneath my body and quickly pulled her out. Then I felt the teeth sink into my leg. I looked back. There was a walker.

But no just any walker.

It was Rick.

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I woke up screaming Ricks name and quickly shot out of bed, not caring about the pain in my head. I ran out the bedroom. Not there. 

"RICK!" I shouted and the tears started to stream down my face.

I checked the babies room. No one. Kara, Judith, gone.

"RICK! DARYL! CARL! BETH! SOMEONE!" I cried.

They were gone, I had nothing, i had no one.

I opened the door and screamed there names once again. Nothing.

I slammed the door and fell against it crying my eyes out. My family, gone.

I pulled myself up and walked over to the large window and opened it, i sat on ledge with my legs outside. I looked down, no walkers, nothing.

If i jumped right now, this would all be over.

No more suffering without them.

No more walkers.

Nothing.

I edged closer and closer to the edge before I stood up. 

I put one foot over the edge.

And i jumped.

I screamed and felt arms go around me and suddenly i was back inside.

Tears streaming down my face, i could hear Daryls voice.

"Emily? Emily are you alright? What are you doing? Emily! Em!"

"Daryl?"

"Emily, oh my god did you seriously almost jump out of that window?"

I cried harder.

"I-I'm s-s-sorry, I thought y-you were a-all go-ne"

He held me close to him waiting for me to stop crying, but i didnt. I just cried harder.

"Em, everyones downstairs, calm down, everyones okay, i came up because i heard shouting, why did you think we were gone?"

Eventually i stopped crying and remembered the nightmares i used to have whenever i got that drunk on birthdays.

"Whenever i get really drunk, i have nightmares, awful ones. I had one last night that I was running from a group of walkers, they were, sprinting. Rick was with me and I was holding Kara, but Rick fell and got bit, i carried on but i fell about 15 minutes later. I killed Kara by falling on her, then i got bit, b-but, it was Rick who bit me"

I started crying again.

"Shh, its okay, Ricks downstairs with Kara, they're both okay, no ones dead, everyones here i promise. Look, go get into bed, i'll make you a hot chocolate, then i'll get Rick"

I nodded and walked into the bedroom, i grabbed my iPad and got into bed. Daryl came in not long after and put a cup of hot chocolate down next to me, i thanked him and he went to go get Rick. 

I was truly shaken up by the dream, i've had bad dreams, but nothing like that. It made me angry. I got up and went into the drawer where all my photo albums were and pulled them out. They were all labelled:

Friend and Me.

Family.

Pets.

My Boy.

Charlotte, Jack and Sansa.

I opened the one that was labelled 'friends' and instantly memories came flooding back to me, i till remembered there names.

Jennifer, Rachel, Ellie, Jasmine, Jamie, Jesse, Lily, Chandler, Joey, Nicole, Katie, Kim and Jack. That was the group of friend i was with the most, we were all really close, i missed them.

I then opened the one that was labelled 'family' and went through all the pictures of my mum, dad, sisters, brother, grandparents, cousins, aunties and uncles, i missed everyone.

I went through the ones labelled 'pets' and 'Charlotte, Jack and Sansa' until i got to the last one,

'My Boy'

I knew this was Shane, i slowly opened it and saw the pictures we took together, the cute one, the silly ones, the normal ones.

I slammed it shut and put them all away. I sat on the bed staring at the walls remembering everything that had happened in this room. I didnt even hear the door open when Rick came in, I just felt the bed sink next to me, then looked to see him, concern on his face.

"Daryl told me everything"

I nodded and he put his hand to my face and kissed me.

I pulled away and put my hand over my mouth before running to bathroom and throwing up into the toilet.

"Sorry" I said when i turned to see him.

Thats when it hit me.

That nightmare i had was worse than the ones i usually have when i get really drunk, and i think i know why.

"Rick, wait outside a sec" I said to him and pushed him out the door before shutting and locking it.

Morning sickness, bad nightmares. It all adds up.

I pulled the pregnancy test out the drawer and looked at it, remembering the words Rick said about not being able to look after another child.

I couldn't be.

I took the test and waited for it to beep. I hesitated before i looked at the result.

I picked it up and tears instantly stung my eyes then started to fall down my cheeks. I picked up my phone and text Daryl:

Daryl what do i do, Rick said we cant look after another child, but im pregnant! What should i do? Im scared!

I pressed send and waited for a reply. After a few minutes, i got one.

He will be fine with it just tell him, what can he do we cant give ya an abortion

I read it and stood up.

He was right, what could he do?

I unlocked the door, "We need to talk"

Rick had worry in his eyes, I sat down on the couch and patted the seat next to me for him to sit down, he did.

I turned to face him and grabbed both his hands.

"Rick, I know you said that we can't but you have to understand this is not my fault, this is not your fault, these things happen"

"Emily, are you okay?"

"Rick i'm pregnant"

Shock filled his face

"Again?"

I nodded.

He squeezed my hands and smiled a little, which made me smile.

"We can do this Em, we can do this together"