Redemption.

Chapter 12

"Hermione?" Hermione snapped out of her daze and looked around. She was in the Gryffindor common room, for a change, sitting with Ginny, Neville and Luna, and just realized they'd been talking to her. 

"Sorry, what?"

"You've been off the whole time." Ginny said. "Anything up?"

"No." Hermione lied easily. "Sorry, just preoccupied with studies. What were we talking about again?"

"I was saying that Harry wrote to me yesterday. He and Ron seem to be enjoying their Auror training."

"That's good!" Luna said smiling. "But ask him if he's involved in the Rootfang conspiracy, Ginny!"

Neville and Ginny laughed, but Hermione was in no mood. Her mind drifted towards Malfoy again, and she couldn't forget the words he'd said.

I'm hard and fast and I take control. 

Had she just dreamed about the scenario in the bathroom, or had it really happened? Three days had passed, and she hadn't seen much of him, making her feel as though she'd just come up with it. But it had seemed so real...the feel of his hot skin; the scent of him, fresh and spicy.

"Hermione!" Neville's voice seemed to be coming from underwater.

"What?" she asked, confused and slightly irritated. 

"Merlin, this girl. Shall we go down for dinner?" he raised his eyebrows. 

It was Friday, and she was thankful for it. She didn't have the mood to do any homework today. When they entered the great hall, her eyes immediately went to the Slytherin table. He was sitting at the end, talking to Blaise. But then he looked up, and their eyes met.
At that moment, Hermione was sure that the incident in the Head's bathroom wasn't just a figment of her imagination. There was heat in his eyes. Fire. Thirst. Hunger. Something she was sure was there in her eyes too. He looked away, and Hermione, trying to fight the disappointment she felt, made her way to the Gryffindor table.

Dinner was the usual affair, although Hermione kept glancing over at Malfoy. He too looked at her, once or twice. He didn't smile, but he didn't sneer either. He just...looked at her. Once dinner was over, Professor McGonagall addressed them.

"Good evening, students. Now that it's been a month since you've all come back, we've decided to conduct a party, to celebrate this new beginning. It will take place next week, Saturday evening."

"May I speak to the Head boy and Head girl please?" McGonagall added.

Hermione walked up to the teachers table. The hall was buzzing with talk about the upcoming event. Hermione avoided looking at Malfoy, now that he was in such a close proximity to her.

"I just wanted to inform you both," Mcgonagall told them "that you'll be opening the party, now that you're the school heads. There will be a ceremonial dance that you will lead." Professor McGonagall informed them. "It is a semi formal occasion...I take it you know what to wear?"

When the two nodded glumly, they were dismissed. Hermione's mind was spiraling uncontrollably. What exactly would she do, now that she had to attend the party with Malfoy? Dance with him?
They walked in silence, up the staircases and to the seventh floor. They were off duty again today, but she couldn't see what she would do in the common room. So when she reached the gargoyle that led to the common room, she turned away and started walking back.

"Where are you going?" Malfoy called.

"To the grounds." She replied, slightly curt. Only slightly.

"Why did you come all the way here then?" He asked, following her.

She glanced at him through her lashes. "Why are you following me?"

"As if!" he huffed. "I just want some fresh air. It's not like you own the place."

"Whatever." she said, rolling her eyes. It felt good to bicker with him about senseless things. It felt good to walk with him into the cool grounds at night, looking up at the blanket of stars that covered the sky.

"By the way, Granger..." he said, when they reached the lake. "sorry for lashing out on you like that." Hermione remembered only too well how he'd screamed at her only a month ago to 'LEAVE HIM ALONE'.

"I must be dreaming." Hermione said. "Draco Malfoy apologized to me." 

"Don't let it get over your head." he said, smirking. 

They were silent for a while, as they neared the glittering lake which reflected the stars above.   

"Ceremonial dance, huh?" he said after a while. "Should be something."

Hermione didn't answer. She knew what he was thinking. They'd have to touch each other in order to dance, and she wasn't sure that was the safest thing in the world. She hoped she wouldn't just kiss him in front of everyone by mistake. Imagine the uproar and mayhem that would cause. Malfoy and Granger. 

They stood in silence. It wasn't awkward; it was just a silence between two people who didn't know what to say to each other. As Hermione looked up at the stars, she wondered if a month ago, she could imagine this scenario. She and Malfoy, Malfoy, sitting on the grounds in respectful silence.

"What you said the other day," Hermione started hesitantly. "About you taking control in bed...did- did you meant it, or was it just-"

"I meant it." he said, looking at her. It was dark, the moon hadn't risen yet, but Hermione could make out his outline. She couldn't detect anything other than earnest truth in his words even if she couldn't see him clearly. "Although I don't think this is best time to talk about how I am in bed, Granger." 

She laughed nervously and her heart sped just a little. "Could you imagine the two of us talking like this?"

"Of course not. But I'm glad we are."

Hermione felt stunned by his words. Was she living in some different reality? Could this be the same Draco Malfoy she'd punched in their third year? As she looked out on the grounds, her mind flashed back to all those months of running and hiding and finally the Great Wizarding War. 

Without thinking, she asked. "Do you think we'll ever be able to forget the war?" It was a supid question. Stupid stupid stupid. War couldn't just be forgotten. 

"Granger.." his voice cracked. She glanced at his dark silhouette, worried that he might suddenly lash out at her again. "I'm so sorry..." Hermione had never, ever heard someone in so much pain. She sensed he was sobbing quietly because she heard him sniff once or twice. She didn't know what he was talking about, but she remained silent, listening. 

"I'm s-so sorry about what-what happened at the manor...I just.." he gulped noisily. "I should have done s-something. She was tor-torturing you and I just stood there..."

Oh.

It felt like a metal hand was squeezing her heart, as Hermione listened to his words. Bellatrix was Cruciating her again, and Hermione found it hard to breathe even in open air. The fear she felt that night, it was the darkest most carnal and animalistic fear she'd ever felt in her entire life. She was an animal being cornered, fighting for her life, with no hope for survival.  

"Sorry...sorry...I'm sorry..." he kept saying sorry, now crying freely. Somehow his tears calmed her down. She was able to breathe again, and it cleared her head. She moved closer to him and put and hugged him tightly around the waist. She kept forgetting how awfully tall he was, and to comfort a huge person like him gave her a sense of power she hadn't experienced before. 

"It's okay." Hermione said softly. "It's okay. I understand you had you parent's and your own life at stake. It's okay.. I get it now."

She held him as he cried and hugged her back. Her heart felt heavy; she wanted to lift some of the burden off his shoulders but she knew he had to fight this on his own. She could lend him her shoulder to cry on, but this was his fight. He had to do this alone.

And no matter how hard it was, she knew he could do it. One part of him that hadn't changed, that she knew only too well, was that Draco Malfoy was confident in himself. He just needed a push now and then.