Redemption.

Chapter 19

The fires in the Hog's Head seemed dimmer than usual. The bitter winter air blew past the window, making it rattle. The snow made the night look brighter, what with the moon making the white frost shine on the windowsill.
Blaise checked his watch. 1:00 in the morning. His eyes itched with tiredness, as he watched his best friend gulp down his 48th glass of Fire whiskey.
"One more." Draco ordered, and Blaise was terrified to hear how lifeless he sounded.

"That's enough Draco." Blaise said firmly. "Let's go back to the castle."

"You go."

Blaise let out a frustrated sigh. He was sleepy, he was tired and he was irritated with his friend's behavior. He knew very well he couldn't just leave Draco alone like this, especially not at night when he was drunk. Ever since the holidays, Draco had been coming down here to the pub to drink until he was trashed. And who had to get him back to the castle without the teachers noticing? Blaise Zabini, of course.

He shuddered as he remembered where he had found Draco the first night of the Christmas vacation- out on the streets at night, howling like a mad dog, and half screaming, half singing 'We can hurt together.'

Blaise pulled himself together. He had to get Draco back to the castle, without the teachers noticing. Again. He watched as Draco drank his 49th glass. He had had enough.

"That's it. Up now." Draco felt too tired to fight against Blaise as he was pulled to his feet and dragged out the door. The wind was biting. The street was deserted. The occasional owl flew past. Draco leaned on Blaise, as they walked back the long, winding path of Hogsmead that led towards Hogwarts.

Draco felt horrible. He missed her. He missed her so fucking much- it was a screaming headache. But he didn't know where she was. She'd disappeared right after their fight, even before the holidays had started. He remembered his conversation with McGonagall when he'd gone into the Headmistress's office to inform her that the Head Girl hadn't come back to their dorm...

"Come in."

Draco walked in feeling anxious but he didn't show it on his face. "Good evening Professor."

"Yes, good evening, Mr.Malfoy. What is it?"

"Uhh..you see Professor, Granger hasn't come back to the dorm, and it's-" he looked down at his watch. "-12:00 already. I checked in the library but she isn't there. She's off duty-"

"Miss Granger has taken an extended holiday, ." McGonagall said, peering at him.

"Extended holiday?" he asked blankly.

"Yes, she left a few hours ago. She's started her vacation a week before the holidays."

"Oh."

He hadn't slept that night. He hadn't slept from that night on, thinking about where she was, what she was doing. The last week before holidays had been torturous for him. He had to sit in all his classes, thoroughly alone, missing her presence more than he should have. He spent more and more time out on the grounds at night, hoping to fill the hole her presence had left, with the wintry snow. It numbed him. He kept hoping to see her- reading on the couch, studying in the library, walking the corridors, lying on the grass next to him, staring at the sky.

Far worse than this empty feeling in his stomach had been his confrontation with Ginny Weasley. The day before the vacations started, she'd cornered him in one of the deserted corridors.

"Malfoy." she glared at him. Draco had no strength in him to fight with her and it was with some wariness that he said,

"Don't you have classes, Weasley?"